Page 55 of Hook, Line and Single

As I head towards the bathroom, I glance back at him. His face is a picture of misery, and I suddenly feel sorry for him.

‘Cameron,’ I say.

‘Mm-hm?’

‘Look at me.’

He raises his eyes to meet mine and I’m suddenly aware that I’m standing in front of him wearing nothing but my knickers and a slightly too small T-shirt that my nipples are currently trying to break through. If little Cameron was reacting to me earlier, my current getup probably isn’t going to help.

‘It’s fine,’ I tell him, trying to style it out. ‘In fact, I’m almost a little flattered. Don’t sweat it, OK?’

Without waiting for an answer, I turn and flee into the bathroom.

* * *

‘Did you sleep well?’ Gabriela asks as she hands us cups of coffee a little while later. Alejandro has already left to drop Sofia at school on his way to work.

‘Very well, thank you,’ I lie politely. Cameron seems to be finding the contents of his coffee cup absolutely fascinating.

‘Don’t worry about him,’ I assure Gabriela. ‘He’s always a bit moody in the mornings. I keep telling him he doesn’t need to beupso early, especially on holiday, but he won’t listen.’

I’m watching Cameron carefully and, to my amusement, he actually flinches when I say the word ‘up’. Fun though it is to tease him, I am going to have to find a way to break through his embarrassment at some point, otherwise today is going to be a very difficult day.

‘I have to drop Pedro at his preschool in a minute,’ Gabriela informs us, totally oblivious to the atmosphere between Cameron and me. ‘Feel free to relax here, and I’ll take you to the airport when I get back. I know your flight isn’t until this afternoon, but better to be early than late, yes?’

‘Thank you. I’m sorry we’re causing you so much trouble,’ I tell her sincerely.

‘Ah, it is nothing. It makes an otherwise ordinary day interesting,’ she replies.

‘Cameron, what do I have to do to cheer you up?’ I ask when Gabriela has disappeared. ‘You’ve got a face like a wet weekend.’

‘I’m just so embarrassed,’ he says. ‘I feel like some kind of sex predator.’

‘Listen,’ I tell him robustly. ‘I’m not going to lie, I was a little disconcerted when I woke up and found little Cameron prodding me in the back like that, but I’m sure you weren’t trying anything on. I’m sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything, but I was trying to make light of it. I know what it’s like for you men. Sometimes little Cameron takes on a life of his own.’

‘Can you please stop calling it that?’

‘What?’

‘Little Cameron.’

‘What would you like me to call it then?’

‘I’d prefer it if you never mentioned my penis ever again, if I’m honest, but the point is that I think giving your private parts names is weird.’

This is too good an opportunity to miss.

‘Really?’ I say, feigning surprise. ‘I thought everybody did. My vagina is called Frou-Frou. Sam calls hers Tallulah.’

This, finally, seems to be the key to unlock him. ‘You’re kidding.’

‘Why would I joke about something so personal?’

‘Tallulah I kind of get, but Frou-Frou? You know that’s the name of the horse inThe Aristocats, don’t you?’

‘For a man, you seem to know your vintage Disney better than I’d expect.’

‘I may have seen a few films in my time. I have an eight-year-old niece.’

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