Page 111 of Even if It Hurts

With everything so fresh, it was too soon to tell which way Evans would fall. But with the Wreckers—and, in turn, Evans’ dad—still on our radar as much as we were on theirs, I knew he’d be forced into making a choice soon enough. As much as that worried me, there was only so much I could do without pushing him the wrong way.

With a heavy sigh, I got out of my car and headed into the house from the garage. Vowing to let Evans’ frustration go—to push it away for another day like the other worrying things in my life.

Like my sister’s cryptic voicemails between her weeks of disappearances, and my endless fear that the Wreckers would retaliate again, tearing the peace I’d found from my grasp. Like Kaia’s social worker, who still wasn’t sure about me, and my frustration with Lainey’s parents because her mom was still getting on her for not working at the farm, and her dad wanted nothing to do with me.

Well . . . almost nothing.

I passed my hand across the small box in my pocket, my heart hammering as I moved through the mud room and into the kitchen. The corners of my mouth lifted at the sound of the girls even as my eyes narrowed on where a half-drunk iced coffee sat on the island. From how watered down it was, I had no doubt Lainey had forgotten about it in the middle of cooking whatever she’d made for dinner, the way she often did.

Forcing myself to leave it there instead of giving into the urge to clean it, I followed Kaia and Lainey’s laughter into the living room of my new house in Huntley. Passing all of Lainey’s furniture and decorations that went way past absolutely necessary. Stepping over toys I was sure Kaia had thrown as she’d gone tearing through the house, since that was her new favorite thing. Breathing because I could handle those things.

I knew I could.

For how trying the house could feel to me at times, I was getting better at ignoring the clutter and embracing life with Kaia. Without a doubt, I owed that growth to the woman who’d just caught my niece in her arms, her head tipped back in laughter as Kaia attempted to tackle Lainey.

“She’s a vicious one,” I warned Lainey, earning a gasp that was equally shocked and excited as stormy eyes snapped to me.

“You’re back!” she said as she stood, already releasing Kaia so she could toddle over to me, babbling, “Assa, Assa, Assa,” the whole way.

Her social worker had glared at me when she’d heard the only word Kaia decided she wanted to say. I hadn’t cared because it wasmine.

“Hey, little Starfish,” I muttered as I lifted her into my arms. “You ready for bed?”

“I thought you’d wanna see her first,” Lainey explained, “but she’s ready.”

I nodded in acknowledgment and pulled Lainey close. Capturing her lips for a long, slow kiss that had her swaying into me with a soft, beautiful smile once it was over. “How was your day?”

“Exhausting,” Lainey said as her smile widened. “I loved it.”

“Yeah?” I asked as I slipped my hand into hers and started leading her toward Kaia’s room. “Tell me.”

I listened as Lainey excitedly told me about her day of teaching at Huntley Academy, where Kaia was also enrolled for daycare. A couple weeks of teaching, and she was still just as excited at the end of each day as she’d been the first day. Maybe even more so now that she felt more confident in what she was doing. And I loved it for her.

She was clearly where she was meant to be. Granted, I’d never witnessed her work at the farm, but I’d seen what just the thought of it had done to her. The difference was night and day.

Now to just get herhere. Because she was clearly meant to be here too.

Not just for a few hours at night before heading back to the house she was sharing with Chloe. Not just when I had to work late, like tonight. I wanted her in my arms when I fell asleep. I wanted her to be the first thing I saw when I woke. I wanted her in every part of my and Kaia’s lives.

So, I slipped the little box from my pocket and pressed it into Kaia’s hand. Waiting until her tiny fingers formed a tight fist around it before passing her back to Lainey the way I usually did, since putting Kaia to sleep was one of her favorite things.

“What about your day?” Lainey asked as she rubbed the tip of her nose against Kaia’s. After a whispered, “Love you, sweet girl,” her attention drifted to me. “How was the security detail tonight?”

“I love you,” I told her instead, and watched Lainey’s expression light up the same way it always did when I told her those three words—as if I was giving her the greatest gift when she wasmine. Just as quickly, her face shifted into confusion as her gaze drifted to the little hand she’d just grasped.

Then she stilled.

But the emotion that burst from her and filled the room before those captivating eyes snapped back to mine? I wanted to savor it. Drown in the intoxicating clash of happiness and joy and love because it was pure Lainey.

“I wanna know if you’ll raise Kaia with me.”

An emotion-filled laugh tumbled from her lips as tears gathered in her dancing eyes, as if she was remembering that night months ago when I told her I’d do exactly this: Buy her a ring and ask her these questions.

Her head bobbed shakily as I added, “I wanna know if you’ll spend the rest of your life with me,” my voice soft and low.

She responded by pressing up on her toes and crushing her lips to mine. Her free hand curled around the back of my neck in an attempt to pull me closer as I deftly took Kaia from Lainey’s grasp to set her in the crib—I’d let Lainey put her to bed tomorrow.

With one last sweep of my mouth across hers, I turned to Kaia and carefully pried the box from her fingers. “I need this,” I muttered when she tried tightening her hold and felt Lainey’s muted laugh.