Page 98 of Even if It Hurts

“You know,” Ada began, a little too nonchalantly, “if you’d stop for just one second to think about it, you’d know you’re good for those girls. You’d know you’ll keep them safe.”

I looked back at Ada, my eyebrows drawing close when her words nearly echoed my own thoughts.

“If you really thought you couldn’t protect the people you love,” she went on, “you would’ve let me retire long ago. You’d be begging me to retirenow.”

I forced my body to slowly loosen when just the implication had me tensing all over again as icy hands gripped at my lungs. And even though she was right, I just held Ada’s defiant stare because I wasn’t sure I’d ever stop trying to protect Lainey from my life.

“She’s asleep,” Lainey said with a satisfied sigh as she exited the hall.

Ada clicked her tongue and offered Lainey a warm smile. “I knew you’d be good for this job, my Ray, but that isn’t what this is.” Her smile turned suggestive as she glanced between us. “You’re a natural with that baby. That’s a bond of love and trust that isn’t typically found with nannies?—”

“Ada,” I warned.

A hesitant laugh left Lainey, and I knew without ever looking at her that it wasn’t because Ada’s words had made her uncomfortable. She was worried they’d mademeuncomfortable.

“Um, thank you again for letting us stay here,” Lainey said as she stopped beside me. “It won’t be long. Chloe Whitlock mentioned she was looking for someone to move in with her, so I’ll call her tomorrow. Or...”—she glanced up at me, her brow furrowing—“whenever I get my phone back.”

“We’ll get it,” I assured her as Ada drew in a quick breath.

“Oh, Chloe isdarling,” she said in a way that had my attention slowly shifting back to her. Because Iknewthat tone and that excitement in her eyes. It was Ada playing her games and pulling her strings, and I was about to hate every second of this. “You know, Lainey, she became a teacher too.”

“Too?” I asked.

“I wanna be a preschool teacher,” Lainey explained under her breath as Ada continued.

“But from what her mama was saying the last I saw her, she wasn’t loving it. I actually don’t think she’s going back this year.” Ada lifted a hand, vaguely pointing at me as that excitement brightened.

My stomach dropped. “No.”

“I wonder if she’s still looking for a job.”

“No,” I repeated firmly.

“It’s the smart thing,” Ada reminded me.

“You want . . . Chloe to have my job?” Lainey asked slowly, uncertainly.

“No, sweet girl,” Ada said on a laugh as I ground out, “No.Hers.”

I saw Lainey shift back out of the corner of my eye. “You’re actually retiring?”

“Trying to,” Ada said with a look daring me to stop her.

“But you...” A hesitant sound left Lainey. “Wait, are you serious this time?”

My stare snapped to Lainey before drifting back to Ada. “This time?”

Lainey gestured to her great-aunt. “She’s been joking about retiring since she started working for you.”

“No more jokes. This girl is old and tired.” She tapped the counter with her hand. “Including right now. It’s time for me to get some sleep. Y’all be good now.”

“We’re talking about this,” I said in low warning.

She patted my shoulder as she passed me on her way to the opposite side of the house. “I’m sure we will.”

“Night,” Lainey said on a delay, then settled against my chest once Ada was out of sight. “Can you stay a while?”

I curled my arms around her, hating that the weariness and uncertainty in her voice was from my life. “I’m not leaving.”

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