Page 53 of Even if It Hurts

“Where are you going?” my mom demanded as I continued toward the front door.

“My childish job.”

I heard her call after me disapprovingly. I heard Jackson’s steps as he followed. But I didn’t stop until I was opening the door of my SUV, and Jackson was turning me into his arms.

“Lainey, think about what you’re doing,” he pleaded, those green eyes burning with an intensity I didn’t recognize. “You heard your mom. Your dad needs you here, and I need you with me.”

I tried swallowing past the knot of grief and indecision and felt like I might choke on it. Everything in me demanded I do exactly what they were telling me to—demanded I help my dad and family the way they needed. But my heart was pulling in another direction altogether.

“What’s wrong with him?” I finally asked.

Jackson hesitated before gently informing me, “Stomach cancer. It’s . . . it’s aggressive.”

My chin shook as I nodded, but just as he started curling his arms around me, I pulled away and climbed into my car.

“Lainey.”

“I have someone else who needs me,” I began, the words thick and weak as they scraped up my throat. “And right now, I need to get to her.”

He grabbed my door before I could shut it. “You’re really gonna choose this job over your family? Overme?”

“Over you? Absolutely. My family? I dunno,” I said honestly, my shoulders hitching. “I dunno what I’m gonna do with what I now know. But today, I’m choosing my commitment to that little girl. I’d choose anything over being near you and the other people trying to control my life in such a heartless way.”

“Heartless?” he echoed as he roughly grabbed my jaw and forced me closer despite my cry of pain. “They begged me not to tell you so you could focus on finishing school, but you? You willingly kept things from me for years, then tried throwing away the future we’d planned for so much longer. If either of us is heartless, it’s you.” He shifted his face even closer so his mouth just barely brushed mine when he seethed, “I have given up my life for you,” before shoving my head back and storming to his truck.

And I just sat there for long seconds, shaking and shaking as my jaw ached and throbbed where he’d been gripping me far too tight.

It wasn’t until Jackson’s truck was gone that I finally broke.

For the stranger I’d just encountered. For the news about my dad. For the battle that was raging even stronger than before. For the dreams that were fading with each day because I felt just as trapped in this life as I’d always been.

By the time I made it to downtown Dallas, I was completely numb.

The doorman didn’t say anything, just hurried to the elevator to prepare it for me. If I looked like as much of a wreck as I had last Friday, he didn’t mention it, and I didn’t care to see. I just stepped onto the elevator with a weak nod because even parting my lips for a simplethanksnearly had me falling apart all over again.

“Where’ve you been?” Asher demanded as soon as I stepped off the elevator and into his apartment, never slowing on my way to where I could hear Kaia babbling to herself. “I’ve been call—Lainey?”

I caught sight of Kaia sitting on one of her blankets in the living room, surrounded by her toys, and felt my heart swell at the smile that crossed her face when she noticed me.

This...without a doubt, this was what I needed today. Every day.

I would figure out the rest. I had to. Because my family was depending on me too.

“Lainey . . .”

I lowered and turned my head away when Asher grabbed my arm with surprising gentleness, and managed to choke out, “I’m here. You can go.”

“No. What’s going on, and why weren’t you answering your phone?”

I reached for my back pocket, then searched my bag. Not fully understanding what I was looking for or what I was seeing as I stared at the screen for long seconds. “I, um...my phone. It’s onDo Not Disturb.” Something I’d only done because Jackson and his parents hadn’t stopped calling and texting after dinner last night, and I hadn’t been able to handle it. “I’m sorry. But you should go.”

“This is the second day you’ve shown up like this.” At the pathetic sounding laugh that left me, he reluctantly said, “I told you, if this is causing too much of a problem for you, I’ll understand. I’ll find someone else.”

“I don’t want—” I flinched when he reached for my chin and realized in the next second what he must’ve seen and what I’d inadvertently confirmed. The wall of shock, suspicion, and fury that slammed into me told me as much.

With that same staggering gentleness, Asher lifted my face until I was staring into wrath-filled darkness as he quickly took me in.

“Name,” he growled.

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