Page 75 of Outside The Wire

“Seriously?” I asked no one in particular.

I didn’t have the brainpower to figure it out tonight. A good night’s rest was the only thing that would help me make sense of whatever the hell that was. Maybe Wyatt could help me work it out tomorrow if she was still acting weird after her morning cocoa.

But the whole drive home, I kept replaying it in my head, wondering if I had done or said something as we left her shop to make her act that way. Had I made her think that things were over between us? I told her I loved her. I did everything I could to let her know I was all in. In fact, I wasn’t quite sure how I could have been clearer about my intentions. If anything, I was probably a little too fucking clear for her.

And maybe that was the problem. Maybe I scared her off. If I screwed this up by telling her too soon how much she meant to me, then I would only have myself to blame. But I didn’t want to risk losing her by not being honest with her.

By the time I got home, I was worked up and pissed as hell at myself for being such an asshole. And the worst part was I still had to shovel out my driveway so I could park there. I worked out my frustrations for the next hour on my driveway, tossing the snow from every fucking inch of the drive onto the lawn on either side. I had worked up quite a sweat by the time I was done,but at least I wasn’t quite as pissed at myself anymore. If she was scared by me being honest, that was on her.

I parked the truck and headed inside for a shower. I was tired and cranky, and going to bed was all I really wanted to do. However, by the time I laid down, my mind wouldn’t shut down, and it had nothing to do with the nightmares that usually plagued me. Now, it was all because of one woman who wouldn’t stay out of my fucking mind.

Goddamnit, why did this woman have to be such a pain in the ass?

My phone rang and I almost didn’t answer, figuring it was a telemarketer, but then I flipped my phone over and saw her name on the screen. Holly Lane.

“Holly Bear,” I drawled, kicking my covers off as I sat up.

“Hey, Asher.”

“Baby, is there a reason you’re calling me when you’re supposed to be sleeping?”

She laughed nervously. Fuck, she was driving me crazy. “So, I was wondering. Earlier, at my house, when you dropped me off. Remember that?”

“Yeah,” I said slowly. “I do recall dropping you off.”

“I mean, of course you remember, but do you remember how things were a little…awkward?”

“Were they? I hadn’t noticed.”

“Really?”

I rolled my eyes, wishing I was there right now to see the expression on her face. “Holly, I’m pretty sure everyone on the block could feel the tension coming from your house.”

“Was it really that bad?”

“The dog across the street was howling.”

She grumbled something into the phone, but I couldn’t understand her.

“Holly, you’re doing that muttering thing.”

“What muttering thing?”

“You know, when you don’t want to tell me what you’re thinking and you’re talking to yourself. That muttering thing.”

“I don’t talk to myself. I was just…you know what? It’s not important.”

It was quiet for a moment. “Baby, do you want to tell me what’s going on?”

She heaved a heavy sigh. “It’s just…we had the after part. Like way, way after.”

“The after part,” I repeated.

“Uh-huh. You know, like after sex when everything’s perfect, but then you go home. Except, we didn’t part ways. We stayed together for two days.”

“And that’s bad,” I said, trying to understand where she was going with this.

“No, it was good. Great, I mean. But it left the after part for way after and now those after feelings are really after making me feel especially after awkward.”

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