Page 123 of Outside The Wire

“How did you find out that Rafe put you there?”

She pulled back and sniffled, grabbing a tissue off the end table. “One of the nurses had a packet for me. I guess Rafe left it in case…”

“In case of what?”

She shrugged. “In case he couldn’t be there. In case he never returned. I have no idea. He left me a note saying he had planned to use me to end The Syndicate, but time ran out.”

Asshole.

“And then he left the nurses instructions for where to send me when I was better. I needed physical therapy and I had to pass a psych evaluation before I could be released. And then I didn’t want to leave.”

“Why?”

She slowly looked up at me, her eyes red-rimmed from crying. “Because of this. What I would find when I saw you again. My therapist prepared me for the fact that you might have moved on, but knowing it and having to witness it are two very different things.”

I would give almost anything to make this better for her, but it couldn’t be me. I wasn’t the man for her anymore. We were different people now. I could see the changes in her just from the ten minutes I’d been here.

“You’ve moved on,” she whispered.

“Jade—”

“Did you remarry?”

“No,” I answered hesitantly. “But I do love her very much.”

A strangled sob escaped her throat as she shoved to her feet and walked to the window. “Where does that leave me?”

“I don’t know. I—You weren’t even alive to me until last night. I guess we get a divorce and?—”

She spun around, her mouth open in dismay as she glared at me. “Divorce? You just found out I’m alive and your first response is to get a divorce?”

“Jade, you’ve been dead to me for five years.”

“But I’m alive. We made vows.”

“Under duress. Our marriage was never supposed to be anything more than a business arrangement.”

Her nostrils flared in anger. “You know it was more than that. We loved each other.”

“Yeah, we did,” I agreed. “I loved you very much, but it wasn’t a relationship built on a foundation of anything solid. We were shoved together and made it work. And then—” I stopped myself before I could go too far. I was pissed as hell right now, and my anger would only get me in trouble.

“And then what?” she snapped.

“Jade, I’m with Holly now,” I said calmly. “I love her. I have a life here with her. Everything about me is different. I’m not the man you fell in love with.”

“You could be?—”

“No, I can’t. That man is gone. Everything about who I used to be is gone.”

“You just changed,” she said incredulously. “You just threw it all away?”

“You did,” I snapped. “You got off the pills. You’re different than you used to be.”

“Yes, because I was in a coma!” she shouted. “I didn’t have a choice in the matter. No one asked me what I wanted out of life. Everything that happened to me was pushed on me. From before I met you until the day of our marriage.” She laughed humorlessly, tears spilling down her cheeks. “You swore you would take care of me, and now you’re just walking away. You’re breaking every promise you ever made to me forher. For some woman who can give you a better life, right? Someone who’s notdamaged. Not some pill-popping, abused and depressed woman. That’s who you want!”

“Jade, that is not what this is about.”

“Then tell me why her!” she cried.