Page 80 of Never Will I Ever

This feelsright.

“You heard me.” I offer him a soft smile and curl my fingers around his neck. The butterflies in my stomach are a fluttering storm as his green irises stare straight through to my soul. “Don’t make me say it again.”

A pained expression etches his features, pulling back his lips in a grimace while he shakes his head. “If you can’t even say itagain, then I clearly shouldn’t do it.”

As if that’s supposed to deter me?

“I wanna feel you inside me,” I whisper immediately.

Shame screams inside my mind, curling its talons around the bars it’s trapped behind, screeching for me to listen.

But I don’t.

I lock it away instead, choosing to focus on right here. Right now.

On just howrightthis is.

“Aves…”

My fingers scrape against his scalp as I roll my hips up into his, allowing my still-aching dick to slide through his palm. “I wanna feel every inch of your perfect dick sliding in and out of me until I can’t think straight.”

I’m not above begging for it at this point.

Tension lines his jaw, but his nostrils flare with lust. “You don’t know what you’re asking.”

“I’m asking for you to fuck me.”

A strangled sound leaves him, and he lets out a sharp laugh. “I don’t have lube, let alone condoms, so—”

Without waiting for him to finish, I roll to my side and reach for my bag, quickly producing the bottle of lube I’d snatched from his cabin this afternoon. Grabbing it was a whim more than anything, but just to be prepared on the off-chance things might progress to this.

And here we are.

Kaleb’s face remains impassive as he takes the bottle I hold out for him, only to stare down at it like it’s a gift from a foreign planet. His Adam’s apple bobs when he swallows before setting it to the side, and it’s only when he meets my gaze again that I see the wariness in his dark irises.

A knot forms in my throat, clogging my airway.

Shit, shit, shit.

“Did I do something wrong?” I manage to ask after an eternity of silence passes.

“I—” He lets out a soft, nervous laugh. “Are you sure?”

No, I’m not. Not entirely. But not for the reasons he’s likely thinking.

I’m not afraid of having sex with a guy, or how I may feel about myself afterward. I’m long past the point where I can deny this is who I really am anymore. Hiding from this part of myself was never gonna be a tenable option anyway.

But what I’m fucking terrified of…is the wayKalebis making me feel.

My teeth scrape over my bottom lip, and I nod. “Yeah. I’m sure.”

“Condom?”

“I’m okay without one,” I murmur, knowing I’d rather feel him without anything between us. “As long as you are too.”

There’s a beat of silence before more excuses start. “Have we done enough prepping, though? I mean, I don’t want to—”

“I’m ready,” I cut in.

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