Page 7 of Fair Catch

Ah, fuck.

None of the above sound favorable, but I guess if I’m being forced to choose, I’ll make my best efforts at being Roommate of the Year.

Mal must pick up on my frustration with the subject, making an effort to change it, “Enough about the new roomie. Tell me how you’re doing.”

I roll my head on the blanket, shifting my attention back to the sky and studying the passing clouds like they’re the most interesting things in the world. Part of me would rather go back to talking about my living with Hayes than go here.

After all, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that she’s talking about my severed friendship with Phoenix, which is still raw in many ways. Having to adapt to a new roommate after three years of living with him only serves as a reminder of his absence in my life as of late.

“I’m okay most of the time,” I say truthfully, though the knot in my throat makes me feel anything but.

Mal’s gaze burns a hole in my cheek as she hedges, “And the other times?”

Blowing out a breath, I murmur, “Those times, I feel really,reallyfucking lonely.”

“I’ll try not to take offense to that,” she teases, and I can hear the smile in her voice before I turn and see it for myself. I attempt to amend my comment, but she lets out another soft laugh and shakes her head. “Don’t get your boxers in a bunch, I’m just joking. I know you love my company when I bless you with it.”

“Oh, do you?”

“Absolutely. Because I, for one, am a fucking delight.”

Chuckling softly, I have to admit she’s right, even just to myself.

If there’s one thing I can be grateful about when it comes to my friendship with Phoenix crumbling, it’s that it opened the door for me to rekindle friendships with other people, like Mal.

The dainty, brown-haired sprite came into my life back when I still lived in Alabama, her house right down the road from mine before Dad moved us to Nashville. She’s one of the few people I kept up with even after moving, and finding out she got a cheer scholarship to Leighton was yet another highlight of leaving for college.

Between her and Phoenix, I was finally surrounded bymypeople.

The ones who love me for me. My chosen family.

Right up until it all went to shit last spring.

“Earth to Kason,” Mal sing-songs and taps on my forehead. “Did you get lost in the clouds?”

“Nah, I was just thinking how much I wish you would’ve just let me room with you.”

She rolls over toward me, drawing my attention to her. “As much asIvy and I love you, I think pushing you outside of your comfort zone will end up being a good thing.” A hint of a smile crosses her face. “Besides, would you really want to share a bathroom withtwowomen?”

No, but…

“Still sounds better than where I ended up.”

That earns me a scoff, which is probably the only unlady-like sound this southern belle is capable of making. “You say that now, but trust me, you wouldn’t last two weeks in our place. I love that girl more than life, but damn if she doesn’t take a million years to get ready in the morning.”

“And yet you’re still the happiest you’ve ever been, right?”

“Yeah, you’re right about that.” A little sigh slips from her, and when I glance over, I catch a tiny, blissful smile spreading across her face. “Then again, that’s what love does to you.”

Something I wouldn’t know anything about, considering I’ve never felt it before—and not for a lack of trying.

I want what she has with Ivy.What Phoenix and Holden have. What fucking everyone seems to have except me. And I’m no closer to finding that than I am to knowing what I plan to do after college if the draft doesn’t work out, which is a whole ‘nother debacle I can’t even think about right now.

If only chatting about these things at length with my therapist gave me some clue or direction or prospects. Unfortunately for me, that’s not how it works.

Mal cuts through my thoughts, asking the one question I’ve been waiting for; the one I was hoping she wouldn’t ask.

“How were things back home this summer?”

---