Page 58 of Fair Catch

He stares at me like a deer in headlights, lips slightly parted, and the way my eyes latch onto them only serves to piss me off more. Not to mention, confuse the hell outta me.

“God fucking damnit, will you just answer the question?”

The bite in my tone must snap him out of it, because he turns back to his desk and speaks into his mic.

“Q, I gotta go,” he says before muting it and closing out the game he’d been in the middle of. Guilt and shame cross his features the second he turns back around, meeting my gaze for the briefest moment before he looks down at his hands. “Look, Kase, I’m sorry. I wasn’t think—”

“Nuh, uh. That’s not cutting it,” I snarl before he dares finishing whatever bullshit apology was about to leave those sinful, perfect lips. “You don’t get to crash my date, kiss the fucking daylights out of me in the bathroom while I’m stillonsaid date, then run outta there like your ass was on fire and think a simple apology is enough of an explanation.”

His teeth worry his lower lips, andmy God,I wish he’d stop drawing my attention back to them. Because I don’t know what to think or what to feel about whatever is going on inside his head.

And from his anguished expression, I don’t think Hayes has any more of a clue than I do.

“You’re right.” The statement comes out gritty and raw, and his gaze lifts to mine briefly, then drops back to the floor. “I wish I had more I could say than that, but I don’t know why it happened, Kase. I didn’t plan to, I just…couldn’t not.”

Couldn’t not? What the hell does that even mean?

Fuck, until recently, I would’ve said he doesn’t even like me as a human being, let alone enough to interrupt my date and kiss me.

I let out an unnerved breath and shake my head, as if that’ll help me make any sense of this.

Spoiler alert: It doesn’t.

“But…we’re justfriends.You’ve never looked at me like that, you’re not attracted to me—”

“Apparently, I am now.” His head drops to his hands, clearly as frustrated by this turn of events as I am. “I mean, my dick doesn’t exactly lie about this kinda thing, and I know for a fact you had to feel exactly what I mean.”

I did. God, I fucking did.

The press of it against my thigh as his mouth devoured mine has permanently fixed itself in the front of my mind since it happened.

But it still doesn’t explain the when or the how or thewhy.

The conversation we had less than a month ago about demisexuality—and how he sees and feels attraction—comes back to me, but as much as I wrack my mind through all the interactions we’ve shared, I can’t find any specific time or moment where things could’ve shifted for him.

“When did this happen?” I ask, my voice coming out rough and grated.

He lets out an agonized, “I don’t know,” and runs his fingers through his dark, wavy hair.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because I didn’t know! I don’t exactly make the rules for this, Kase. It just happened.” There’s a flare of fury and a heat in his eyes as they finally lift to meet my gaze, two vibrant blue flames. “I thought we were becoming friends, that that’s the bond we were making. I don’t know what triggered it, I don’t know why now or why you or anything other than that since you’ve moved in, I’ve created a different emotional connection with you. One that’s deep enough for this attraction to appear.” He pauses, head falling into his waiting palms again before adding a disgruntled, “And apparently, my dick really fucking likes it when I’m kissing you.”

There’s a beat of silence that lingers between us as we both process that final sentiment. It’s not funny; no part of this entire scenario is funny. Yet as I stare at my roommate who I’ve been doing my best not to fantasize about formonthsnow—the one I’d accepted that there’s no way anything would ever happen with—I can’t help the laugh that bursts free.

And it’s not just a single chuckle, either. It’s an uncontrollable fit of laughter that has me gasping for air and covering my mouth because of how inappropriately timed it is.

Hayes looks less than amused as he rises from his chair. “Oh, fuck you, Kason. This isn’t funny, and I’m not gonna sit here and listen to you laugh at me all goddamn night.”

Shoving past me, he storms out of his room and down the hall. I follow him, still trying to contain my amusement, which earns me a glare as we enter the living room.

“I’m not laughing at you, I swear,” I say between chuckles that slowly begin to fade.

His expression is dubious at best, and he crosses his arms. “Then what would you just call what you’re doing?”

My laughter finally subsides into a long sigh. “Honestly? Confusion. Or maybe irony?” My fingers rake through my hair absently, searching for some explanation for how I’m feeling. The problem is, I really don’t know what that is.

“It’s just…fuck, Hayes. You’re the one who pushed me into dating. Whoreallyset me up on this stupid app. Who took it upon yourself to vet these guys for me until the so-calledright onecame along,and when I finally find a guy I even enjoy being on a date with,you go and do this.”

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