Page 30 of Fair Catch

I blink, not sure if I’m offended that he’d assume I would have any issue with something no one has any control over.

“Considering my best friend is bi and I’m also a member of the alphabet mafia, I’d be one helluva hypocrite if I had any issue with you being into dudes, Kason.”

Frowning, he repeats, “‘Alphabet mafia?’”

“The queer community.”

Kason looks completely rattled, staring at me with wide eyes. “Really? Why didn’t you say anything? What are you?”

The questions come out in rapid-fire succession, and each one of them makes me roll my eyes.

“Not that it’s any of your business, ace spectrum. Demi, if you want to be specific.” Leaving it at that, I motion behind me with my thumb. “Now are you gonna answer me about food or go back to swiping on that dude who looks like he’s taken one too many hits off a joint.”

He ignores my comment about food entirely when he finally speaks, only to come up with, “He did not look like that,” as his best defense.

“Oh, he definitely did.” I point to the phone in his hand. “Pull it back up and I’ll show you.”

“Oh, my God,” he mutters under his breath. “You’re insane.”

But he must be curious, because he unlocks the screen and reopens the app he was just scrolling through. The same guy’s photo pops up that he was looking at prior to his impromptu game of hot potato, and the two of us stare at the screen while he slowly scrolls through the six images on his profile.

“That one,” I say, pointing to the photo I was talking about. “I dare you to say I’m wrong while looking at that picture.”

Kason mumbles something under his breath rather begrudgingly, thumb hovering over the screen.

“Kason, don’t be so stubborn that you swipe yes on that dude just to prove a point,” I chide, reaching for his phone to swipe for him.

“Ugh. Fine, you win,” he concedes before swiping left.

My chest swells while humming, a little too pleased with myself. “Like I said. Higher than a fuckin’ kite.”

At first I think he’s planning to swipe out of the app after he gets rid of that stoner bozo. Then I catch Kason’s thumb teetering toward the right on the next guy—who looks like he barely has two brain cells to rub together with a bio to match—like he’s planning to swipe yes on him, and I can’t stop myself from speaking up.

“Seriously?”

The judgment in my tone must be what finally pulls his attention away from the screen, and he meets my disapproving gaze. “What now?

I arch a brow and nod at his phone. “You’re actually contemplating swiping yes on” —I lean in more so I can read off his screen verbatim— “Zak, who ‘is not gender fluid, but is definitely tryna put fluid in every gender’?” Doing my best to keep my laugh in check, because it is kinda funny, I ask, “So what I mean is, ‘seriously, Kase, that sounds like someone you want?’”

Kason’s ears tint the slightest shade of pink at my assessment, and he silently swipes left to reveal the next guy rather than rebut my point. Unfortunately for him, from this guy’s bio alone—Poly, partnered, and kink positive, so I’m just looking to tie you up, not tie you down—he’s not much better.

“Next,” I tell him before reaching down and swiping left for him.

Next is Ben.If our conversations don’t bang, neither are we.

I swipe for him again. “Nada.”

Kris is promising for all of point five seconds, till I see his answer towhat is one way your friends describe you?isDongzilla.

“Nope,” I say, popping the P.

Then there’s Patrick.I have hand tattoos, so you know I like making bad decisions.

Glancing at Kason, I murmur, “If you’re into that, I guess.”

He hesitates before ultimately swiping left, and honestly, this is starting to feel like a gameshow.

Next to the screen, we’re welcoming Logan, who states:I have arthritis in my neck and back, but my bussy and my crack are just fine.

---