Page 84 of The Chance

Some people get to have their love in the lifetime they find them in.

Those peoplearen’tme, like I wish they were.

God, I fucking wish I was one of them.

I swallow down the truth thickening in my throat and deflect. “You really are seeing someone, aren’t you?”

Dare wheels back like I slapped him.

Bingo.

If my heart didn’t feel like it might burst, I’d celebrate. Pump my fists up in the air and poke all of the fun at him.

But I do none of that because none of this feels …real.

“We’re both fucked, aren’t we?” Dare asks the cement with downcast eyes and a downturn to his lips.

I sputter out a macabre laugh and lean back into the tour bus’s fiberglass side. “Yeah. Pretty much.”

Dare mimics my pose and shoves his hands in his pockets. “Is it Jordan though, right?” My brows shoot up past my bandana. “How the hell does this work?”

If it’s possible, my brows jump higher.

Deflect it!

“Oh shit, Darius. I know it’s bad when you’re askingmefor advice.”

Dare smacks his lips but doesn’t deny it as his gaze travels back out to the parking lot surrounding us.

But then his head falls back against the tour bus, and I can see the indecision warring across his pinched features.

Pretend. Pretend. Pretend.

“Are we really doing this?” I ask, tilting my head and begging my heart to not leap out at the first chance to say how it feels out loud. As if sharing the load with someone else might lighten it just the tiniest bit. That maybe, and I meanmaybe, some of this will make more sense to someone else.

Because, fuck, I wish this was easier.

What feels like hours but is probably only seconds later, Dare’s head lulls in my direction and a single dip of his chin is all the answer I get before he opens his big mouth.

“You’re stupid for not admitting it to yourself.”

I scoff, though my heart thumps angrily inside my chest. “And you’re stupid for pretending to not like guys even though you’re clearly seeing one.”

“Burn.”

Shaking my head, I let my weight slide down the side of the tour bus to the cement parking lot. I’m pretty sure that if all my feelings weren’t trapped inside my sternum it’d be uncomfortable, but it seems to be all I can focus on. This ball inside me that festers and rolls and collects debris the longer I try to hold it back. Growing larger until I feel it buried just behind my tonsils.

“You’re right,” Dare murmurs as he slides down the side of the bus to join me. “I don’t know that it’s quite what you have with Jordan, but I’m seeing a guy, and I definitely didnotfuck those chicks back at the penthouse.”

I shrug and ignore the ping of jealousy for what DarethinksJordan and I share. “You don’t have to justify shit to me. You do you.”

“It’s been rocky as fuck.” He sighs. “We never agreed to exclusive, and I never expected that hewouldbe.”

My brow furrows some more. “But no one knows about you two.”

“Nah. Well, everyone suspects something’s up, but no one has asked outright.”

I nod, an understanding washing over me at his words.

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