Page 123 of Burn for You

I pull my legs up, hugging them to my chest. “Exactly like you said—he cares about me.”

She turns to face me. “And that’s a problem?”

“I think he’s in love with me, Isla,” I whisper.

“I kind of got that idea when he showed up at my place on my wedding night, refusing to leave until I agreed to talk to him. He’s freaking out, May. He’s so scared he’s lost you.”

I shrug. “He never really had me.”

She gives me a knowing look.

“He didn’t,” I say. “We were never…official.”

“That doesn’t mean shit. You and I both know it. Let’s talk about what’s really going on here.”

I sigh. “Marisol said it like it was so obvious…”

Isla smiles. “It is. Just like it’s obvious to me that you might feel the same. If you didn’t care about him, you wouldn’t run. You’d laugh in his sorry little face and strut away.” That pulls a shaky laugh from me. She shakes her head. “It might not be obvious to everyone else, but I know you.”

I look over at her and she grabs my hand in hers, tears threateningto escape her eyes. “I remember that night, how scared you were. I remember how much you trusted Owen, and I remember the next day. I remember the way I saw that sparkle in your eyes go dark.”

I sniff and that’s when I take notice of the tears streaming down my own face. God damnit, I’ve cried more in the last month than I have in my entire life.

“In all the time since then, whenever I’ve seen you with a guy, I was worried that spark would never come back, that it had gone out for good. But it did. With him, it did.”

I close my eyes, trying to ignore the earnest in my best friend’s eyes.

“I know you’re scared. I know you’re scared to put your trust in him, but if the way he looks at you is any indicator, he’s not bailing on you anytime soon. And if that’s not convincing enough, the fact that he braved interrupting Caio and I on our wedding night should reassure you that he’s not giving up on you either.”

I open my eyes, letting the floodgates open, my tears pouring out of my eyes. I see Isla through my blurry vision and she’s a mirror of myself, her cheeks wet with tears. “Do you think I can do it?” I ask.

She tilts her head. “Do what?”

“Marriage, kids, dog.”

She lets out a watery laugh. “If that’s what you really want, of course. You can do anything, May.” She squeezes my hand. “But I think maybe you should start with just talking to him first.”

I think I want that with him. Even though my instincts tell me to run, I think I want everything with him. I think I want to forget everything I thought I knew and instead learn something new with him.

I nod. “Can you tell him where to find me?”

She lets go of my hand and wraps her arms around me. “I’ll tell Heath to let him in this time.”

I pull out of her arms and shake my head. “No, not here.”

I sitdown on the chair where I sat weeks ago, waiting for a bite on the end of my line. Back then, I found peace in the sounds of the nature, but now it feels like every whoosh of water over the rocks, every tweet of a bird, lasts for an eternity while I wait for Rafael to show up.

Talking to Isla helped to clear my mind. She knows me, and she knows the innermost parts of my mind that I can’t even explain in words.

I feel like I’ve been fighting my instincts since the last time Rafael and I were here. My instincts telling me to stay away, to hold back and keep my heart under lock and key. But it’s feeling harder and harder every day I spend with Rafael. I don’t know how to make it stop. Do I let my instincts take control? Or do I push them aside and try to ignore the one thing that I’ve always known?

The rumble of Rafael’s truck startles me. I let out a controlled breath. I shouldn’t be surprised. I did tell him to come here. I just thought I’d have a bit more time to get my thoughts in order.

If I’m being honest with myself, I’ve spent the last hour sitting here with a blank mind. Earlier my thoughts were running, tumbling through my mind without caution, but now it’s just empty up there. Not even a tumbleweed.

I was so sure when I was talking to Isla, so confident that this is what I want. But the more time I’ve sat here by myself, the more that confidence has slipped away. I don’t know what to think, so I’ve just been thinking nothing, and now Rafael is here. He will want an explanation from me, and I don’t know that I have one. At least not one that sounds coherent.

I hear the truck door shut behind me, but I don’t look. I don’t want to see the look on his face. I don’t know what I’ll find.That doesn’t work though, because within a minute, he’s in front of me.

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