Page 51 of Bound to You

“Do you ever feel like you’re just a little acorn or a leaf or something, and the world is just having its way with you?” Her voice is tired, and she’s still a little drunk, but I can hear the conflict in there. I put the last dish on the drying rack before I move over to where she’s siting as she continues. “Like a storm is always looming, the wind just blowing you around in every direction with no intention of stopping. Like you have no idea where you’re heading.”

Her words strike a chord with me, I felt exactly like that when I first landed here, no clue what I was doing or why I was here. Is this why she’s been so quiet? She’s been in her head about where her life is headed.

I come to stop in front of her. “Isla,” I say, running a finger down her bare shoulder, eliciting those goosebumps I love to see. “You could do anything you’ve ever dreamed of. Complete control over your life is only a hairbreadth away. I promise, you just need to reach out and take a hold of it.” She looks up into my eyes. I can almost taste the alcohol on her breath she’s that close, and fuck how I want to give in and see what she really tastes like, but not tonight, not like this. So I just tuck a wavy strand behind her ear. “For the record, sweetheart, I’m glad the storm blew you here.”

chapter twenty

ISLA

The wind keeps tossingloose strands of my hair into my eye-line as I sit cross legged in the sand with my sketch pad in my lap. When we went out on the boat, I noticed this small beach tucked away in the corner of the bay, and decided today was the perfect day to make the trip out here. I’m surprised there’s not more people that come to swim here, the waves are so calm inching their way up the sand, but I can see the locals from here in the distance, jumping off the rock wall on Main like they do every day.

I’ve slowly been filling the pages of the book Nora gave me with my pastel artworks. I’m finding myself attracted to the imperfectness of them, and today I wanted to come down here for some peace, and for some new scenery to take inspiration from, but my hair flying into my face is interrupting said peace.

I rip out my hair tie before pulling my hair back into a braid. I’m halfway through when my phone buzzes in my pocket. I half expect it to be Brandon when I pull it out, before remembering that I blocked his number late last night. I was sick of the bombarding messages and after my conversation with Caio last night I decided I don’t need to waste any more energy on him,even if that is just pushing decline on his calls. Hopefully he’ll finally get the message and leave me alone.

My mom’s face flashes up on my phone, still buzzing in my hand. The photo is of the both of us at my high school graduation, I’m smiling so wide at the camera, and she’s looking at me, pride welling in her eyes, she was so excited for me, and I was equally excited for my future, thinking my mom would be so proud when I finished my degree, following my passion. I let my hair fall away as I contemplate whether I should pick up or not.

“Hi, Mom.”

“Isla? Oh honey it’s so good to hear your voice.” A wave of guilt crashes over me at the amount of her calls I’ve declined since being here. I just haven’t been able to bring myself to hear what she’s got to say about everything that went down.

“Why haven’t you been picking up?”

“Sorry Mom, I’ve just been busy,” I say. It’s not completely untrue.

“Too busy to answer even Brandon’s calls?”

“Mom, I broke up with Brandon.” As if she doesn’t know this. “There’s no reason for me to answer his calls anymore, I don’t want to see him again, or talk to him for that matter.”

“Never mind that, what are you doing there?”

“Just relaxing Mom, taking some time for myself.”

I can hear her sigh on the other end. “Well, when will you be back?”

“Not until the end of summer.”

“Oh honey that’s far too long, you need to come home soon, back to your real life.” But the longer I’m here, the more my life in New York feels like it’s not my real life, or like maybe it shouldn’t be.

“Your father has said he will keep a spot here for you at his firm if you come home now.”

“Mom, I’m not coming home now, and even if I was, I don’t want to work at dad’s firm, I never have.”

“Brandon is working there now, you two could work together.” Of course he is. I don’t even want to know how he wormed his way in. I don’t miss the fact that she ignored my earlier comment that I don’t want to see Brandon, let alone work with him.

“Mom, I’m not coming home for a while so tell dad to fill the position.”

“Don’t be a silly girl.” Her patience snaps. “You can’t just frolic off on some little holiday, don’t you realize how this affects your father and me? You need to come home now.”

“How this affects you?”

“Everyone is asking where you are, what you’re doing, where you’re going to work, and what are we supposed to say Isla? You had a hissy fit and disappeared after we talked to you about a real career. I understand you like to paint and that’s why we allowed you to study it, but we all knew you would think about something serious when you finished. Take after your brother, look at how well he is doing. Everyone asks about you, and we don’t know what to say!”

Does she miss the fact that her son is so successful, yet he never comes home to visit?

“I miss you too Mom, but I can’t come home right now, have a good day,” I say before hanging up.

I let out a long breath, tossing my phone away from me, cringing when it lands in the sand. If I stayed on that call any longer, I don’t know how much longer I could’ve been polite.

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