Page 77 of Back in the Saddle

I shook my head. “If she’s so bad, why is she here?”

“Not of her own volition, is it? Our children had to spend their own money to get her here.”

“She has four children to look after.”

“Don’t give me that shit. They’re fucking adults. And when they weren’t, who paid their school fees and brought them what they needed? It wasn’t fucking her. It was us.” She was shouting so loud I’d be surprised the whole farm couldn’t hearit. “And who sat with them night after night helping with their homework over the phone and through email? It wasn’t her, was it?”

I clenched my hands. “You said it didn’t bother you that we helped them.”

Her nostrils flared. “No, Ciaron, it didn’t bother me. I love them.” Her voice was like steel. “You’re missing the whole fucking point.”

The point? Yeah, my mam was the point. But what abouthermother?

“Why did you tell Mum about what happened at the party but not me?”

“I haven’t spoken to my mum about the party.”

“Why did she know you were upset, then?”

“Because she’s not fucking blind.”

I stared at her, dumbfounded.

She was shaking. Her chest was heaving as she stared at me, waiting for something. And I had no fucking clue what.

“Open your eyes.” She grabbed her PJs, stormed to the ensuite and slammed the door.

I waited for the shower to turn on. I got changed and hopped into bed. I squeezed my temples. What the fuck were they talking about at the party? Things were tense before that, but now they were at a whole other level. I needed to press Taylor about it…when she was calmer.

When Taylor came out, she slipped into bed without saying another word. Great. Looks like we were back to where we were two weeks ago.

My alarm went off,and I groaned. I hadn’t slept well. I’d been thinking about the argument. I needed to get to the bottom of what Taylor meant. She obviously thought I was missing something. I went through all the interactions with Mam, over and over. Taylor was right. She had pointed out when Taylor had done things wrong, but that was because she cared for me, right?

But this wasn’t the first time she’d tried something like that.

I wasin our kitchen watching my brothers do their homework while I cooked dinner. Taylor was supposed to have called by now. I put the stirring spoon down and went to the phone. I picked it up to check if there was a dial tone. Maybe Mam hadn’t paid the bill again, and it had been cut off. There was a buzzing on the line. It was working.

Mam walked in as I put the receiver down. “She hasn’t called you today.”

“No, she said yesterday that it might be late.” I went back to the stove and stirred the stew. I grabbed a piece of meat out to test. It melted in my mouth. I turned the stove off.

Mam patted my arm. “She has probably thought about things now that there is time and some distance between you.”

Here we go again.

“I’m sure she hasn’t changed her mind. I haven’t.”

“She probably realises it would be better for her to have an Australian man. One that wouldn’t need to leave his family.”

I moved away, grabbing bowls and cutlery. “I will only be a phone call away.”

“But we need you here. An Irish woman would be so much better for you. What about Molly at the pub? She’s a lovely Irish girl.”

“I don’t think Molly is interested in men.”

“Nonsense. Who wouldn’t be interested in you?” She held a finger to her lips and gazed at the phone. “I know this feels all lovey dovey,”—her voice had dropped to a soothing tone—“but I’m afraid you may lose interest. And then you will be stuck all the way over there with no one.”

“I love Taylor, Mam, and she loves me.”

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