Page 18 of Back in the Saddle

I couldn’t let him deal with his mother alone. He’d saved me when we’d first met, and I was in a very similar situation with myfather. I needed to do the same for him now. We could fix this. We could fix us. I hope.

I stepped directly in front of him at his desk and waited for him to look up at me. When he did, my stomach was all jittery. I wiped my hands on my jeans. “Your mother will only be here for a couple of weeks.” Any longer and I might kill her. “You can move back home, and we can pretend everything is normal.”

I was sure we could do it. Before the last few months, we’d been inseparable since the day we’d met, except for the short time when I’d waited for him to arrive in Australia. In that short time, we were connected by our hearts only. After that, we were connectedeverywhere.

“Are you sure?” Ciaron asked, stopping my wandering mind.

“I think it’s the best solution, don’t you?”

He nodded, his jaw set. Was he about to say something I didn’t want to hear? Like it would only be pretend and that’s all it could ever be? “Just to make it clear, I have no intention of moving back to Ireland. No matter what.” He held eye contact. His voice was strong. I didn’t doubt him.

“OK,” I whispered, sitting down across from him. My legs couldn’t hold me steady any more. All this time I’d been agonising over him leaving because of something my stupid father had said. His firm assurance in this moment was a relief.

“I don’t want to put up with her emotional blackmail. On the phone, I can walk away at the end of the call. I can talk to you or the kids.” He always had. And at night, in bed, we’d talk about it. I’d comfort him as I wished he’d stop calling her. But he was too good of a person for that.

I reached out, hesitant, my fingers trembling slightly and took his hand. I wanted him to know I was there for him. His rough fingers held onto mine, tethering us together. A small jolt of energy spread up my arm, leaving a slow burn beneath my skin.

“If she doesn’t know about the separation, the better for all of us,” I said, raising my eyes to his.

He smiled, a sad smile that nearly broke my heart.

“Go and pack,” I said. “And while you’re at it, think of a suitable punishment for our children.”

But while they deserved punishment for their act of deception, I was cheering on the inside because now we had a chance. Or I had a chance to make it right. To earn his love back.

Knowing the kids were on our side, and Mum, would make it so much easier. If Mary ever became aware that we’d fallen out of love, it would be the opening she needed. She’d never been on our side, only on her own. And her own meant getting back at me for taking her son away.

I was betting on being in close quarters with Ciaron magnifying my efforts. Just like those first three days we’d spent together twenty-two years ago, where we declared our love and made a life commitment. I would get that commitment back on track.

9

Ciaron

Icalled my brother Ronan on the way to the front gate.

“Hello,” he said, way too chirpy for 6 am, Irish time.

“Did you forget to tell me something?” I said, not bothering with any preamble.

Silence.

“Maybe that Mam was coming to Australia,” I prompted.

“Isn’t it grand?” he asked.

If he was standing next to me, I would have punched him.

“No, it’s not fucking grand. You know Taylor and I have separated. Now, we are moving back together and pretending to love each other to keep Mam off my back.”

He snorted.

“You think this is funny?”

“I didn’t tell you because I was sworn to secrecy by my darling niece and nephew. And before you ring the other three, they were sworn to secrecy too.”

“What happened to having each other’s backs?”

“I’m not exactly sure what the problem is here,” he said, ignoring my comment. “I doubt you will have to pretend much. You’ve loved her since the moment you laid eyes on her.”

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