Page 38 of Eternally Bound

The silence was thick between us as I waited for his response. He was back in my life, and I wanted to be in his life, but I couldn’t just go with the flow without knowing what was going on. He had to give me something, make me a partner in his life. Twelve years ago, I went along, not asking any questions and just enjoying the moment. It ended up costing me years of anguish and tears for him. This time, I wanted his dark pieces too. I’d stick with him through everything.

He pushed his hand through his hair, and for a moment, I thought he’d finally tell me what was going on, talk to me.

“I have some stuff to take care of today,” he uttered and the disappointment was bitter. But then what did I expect? “Get comfortable here, Ainslee,” he added.

He turned around and walked out of his office, never glancing back. I slumped back against his desk, trying to understand why he kept me at arm’s length.

* * *

I hadn’t seenDaniel for the rest of the day. I assumed he wanted Mum, Bram, and I to get used to our surroundings. Mum and Bram were over the moon at our new situation. It made me suspicious that my mother wasn’t even questioning the need to be here. It was as if she trusted Daniel explicitly and didn’t even question his motives.

Bram safely tucked into his bed and sound asleep, I roamed the hallways. It was too early to go to bed, yet my mother insisted she was done for the day. Hence leaving me alone, roaming an empty castle.

I found myself in an elegant salon. Somehow this room didn’t fit Daniel’s aura at all. It was too pink, too girly, too light. I sat myself at the end of the couch and pulled out my cell phone.

There are several messages I missed. Eleven, to be exact. And they were all from Callen. I stared at them. He hadn’t messaged me that many times in the past three months combined.

I’m sorry, Ainslee.

I promise no more gambling.

I scoffed at that. It was a bit too late for that. He promised that the last time too. And the time before.

Can you call me so we can talk about it?

I love you.

Please call me.

There wasn’t a single message about Bram. My mother didn’t dislike Callen, but she didn’t exactly like him either. She always said he wasn’t the one for me. But once I got pregnant, I felt like he needed to be the one for me. As much as it pained me to admit it, my mother was right. She always said that her love with Dad was all-consuming, earth shattering, there wasn’t anything like it. It was the reason she never got married again.

I was wrong all along to lead Callen on. For trying to move on when I knew my heart already belonged to another. Last night made it obvious I never moved on. I had never felt a fraction of those feelings with Callen.

I dialed Callen’s number, although I had no clue what I’d say.

“Ainslee,” he cried out, desperation in his voice.

“Hello, Callen.”

“Please, let me explain,” he started, and suddenly I was too tired. I was too exhausted to hear his excuses, to justify him, to offer him comfort.

“No, Callen,” I stopped him. “There is nothing to explain.”

“Really?” There was disbelief in his voice. “So we are okay?”

“No, we are not okay,” I snapped. “We have been trying to work this out for too long. Truth is that there is nothing between us, Callen. Our son is the only thing that is keeping us in touch.” I took a deep breath and then continued. “I care about you, Callen. But only as my son’s father. I want you to be part of Bram’s life; however, I won’t force it.”

“Oh, God,” he cried out. “It’s because I used you as leverage in the card game.”

The anger rose inside me at those words.

“Yes, and the fact that you went back to gambling,” I hissed. “Did it ever matter to you that you were endangering our son? Me?”

“I’m trying to get the money to pay it back,” he justified.

“It’s too late,” I yelled into the phone. “He already has me.”

“W-what?”

---