Page 7 of Submit

Chapter Three

Skye let herself into her third-floor apartment, her hands still shaking as she pulled off her wool coat. She hadn’t been able to calm down since she’d left the café and her conversation with Adam Dunne.

Had it really even happened? It all felt dream-like to her now. Too good to be true. Too frightening. But this was what she’d wanted, wasn’t it?

She’d wanted an experiment, an experience. To experience just once the pleasure-pain principle she’d fantasized about for so long. The idea of submitting— submitting more to the sensation than anything else—even if only in the moment, had been thrilling for as long as she could remember having sexual desires. But she hadn’t expected to find a man she’d be so unbearably attracted to. That complicated things.

Adam complicated things.

He was graceful in the way only an utterly self-confident man could be, which was the sexiest thing about him. Except for his mouth, maybe—lush and begging to be kissed, except she understood this man had never begged for anything in his utterly confident life.

She groaned and tossed her coat and purse down on the antique sea chest in her front hall, kicked off her shoes and padded barefoot across the hardwood floors of her small living room to the bay window overlooking the city.

The apartment was on a hill overlooking the Castro district. This was a beautiful neighborhood—well-kept, safe, and one of the few areas in San Francisco to get the occasional bit of sun.

It was twilight now and the evening fog was rolling in, turning the lights on the neighborhood below her into a glowing wash of color. Wisps of fog threaded its way between the mini-Tudors and remodeled Victorians that lined the streets. Sometimes the San Francisco fog made the city cold and lonely looking, but she was glad for the sense of solitude it brought now. She had a lot to think about.

Was she getting in over her head? Her whole body gave a long, lovely shiver as she pictured Adam in her mind. He obviously knew exactly what he was doing. She felt so naïve with him, which wasn’t something she was used to. She’d always thought herself to be somewhat sophisticated when it came to sex, which was why she’d even considered approaching such an extreme sexual arena. Yet he didn’t seem to expect anything more from her than the bare bones of knowledge about the subject.

I’ll be responsible for everything…

Yes, she knew he would be, she had an absolute sense of that.

How frightening.

How utterly freeing.

She had three days to ponder this, to look over the questionnaire he would send, to make her final decision. He’d made the assumption that she would come to him—and she’d agreed to—but she had to really think things over. She needed to think beyond her response to his sharp, male beauty, his natural air of command. That was the responsible way to handle the situation. The smart way.

Adam.

Her pulse raced, her limbs going warm and weak as she imagined his large, capable hands on her naked skin. They’d be rough. Demanding. Expert in every way, she was certain.

Mmm… yes…

Her body heated as she ran her hands over her thighs, imagining they were his hands, her skin lighting up with exquisite, nearly painful need. That’s what he did to her.

Oh, hell, who was she kidding? She’d made her decision the moment she’d seen him walk into the café. She wanted this. More specifically, she wanted to do these things with Adam. In fact, if she were going to be perfectly honest with herself, she could hardly wait to see him again.

Three more days. It suddenly seemed like far too long to wait.

Wednesday and most of Thursday passed quickly enough. She’d taught a few classes, which kept her distracted during the day. The evenings she’d reserved to go over the long questionnaire Adam had sent her.

He was right—there were things on there that had never occurred to her, some of them too scary to contemplate, some of them enticing. Some surprisingly so.

Would she like to play with hot wax? Maybe. She’d always been a little afraid of the burning sensation, but she also imagined there could be a warm sensuality to it. She’d read that it all depended on the kind of wax it was and how it was poured onto the skin, that it could be pleasant or cruel. Which direction would Adam take it? And what about the ground in between, where pleasure and pain existed side by side? That was what she really wanted to know, to experience.

She shivered, a sensual frisson skittering across her skin like a warm current. She forced her focus back to the questionnaire.

Would she like to try caning? She had to pause, leaning back against the pillows she’d plumped up behind her on the pretty white iron bed, her fingers resting on the edge of the laptop balanced on her knees. She just might, if the right man were wielding the cane. If Adam were wielding the cane. She was surprised by her own response. Caning had always seemed so extreme and it was amazing how her ideas about her own desires could shift given the right motivation.

Adam was spectacular motivation.

Her sex squeezed and she flexed her toes under the edge of the pale vintage blue and white quilt.

Amazing what he was doing to her already, mind and body.

Would she want to be tied up? Most definitely. Would she allow any sexual contact?

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