Page 13 of The Scars of Us

My eyes rose up to meet Kamden’s, pausing on the long scar across his chest before our gazes locked.

“I’m sorry. I’m okay, you can go back to bed,” I said, barely above a whisper.

“Are you sure? I can stay if you want,” he offered, wiping the tears from my face.

Even though I didn’t want to be selfish, I knew I’d never fall back asleep without him. “Please,” I murmured.

Kamden softly smiled as he slipped under my comforter. Turning on my side, I propped my hand under my pillow as Kamden draped his arm over me.

Even with his familiar embrace and warm breath on the back of my neck, I couldn’t fall asleep. Choking back a sob from the images that I couldn’t get out of my head, my body involuntarily shook with fear.

Kamden turned me over so that I faced him before he rubbed my back softly, slowly lulling me to sleep in the safety of his arms.

Kamden had let me sleep late before finally waking me up to get ready to go to the gym. My mind was conflicted over the idea, both loving and hating the fact that I was going to see Ryker.

Once we walked into the gym, I thought I was going to throw up from the nerves that had built up in anticipation of seeing him.

What am I going to say to him? Will he even talk to me again?

I didn’t see Ryker as we walked into the cardio room, and relief and disappointment simultaneously flooded me. I hopped on an elliptical, not wanting to have another freak accident like last time, as Kamden headed to a treadmill across from me.

I put my earbuds in before starting up on the machine, letting the music block out the world around me. I didn’t even notice Kamden come up next to my machine until he tapped my arm.

I reflexively startled, my body jerking before I focused on him. Pulling my left earbud out, I asked, “What’s up?”

“I just wanted to tell you that I’m going to the weight room.”

“Oh, okay. I’ll be here.”

As he left, I saw him stop to talk to Ryker.Shit.

Ryker glanced in my direction, and I immediately darted my eyes away.

My eyes kept finding him as he continued to talk to my brother. After they finished, he headed towards me, no doubt wanting an explanation for last night. The knots in my stomach intensified the closer he came, and I had to stop myself from running away.

You’d definitely look like a crazy person then.

I pulled out my earbuds when he reached me, preparing for the inevitable. “Hey,” I lamely greeted.

“Hey, yourself. What happened last night?”

Sighing, I averted my eyes from his as I replied, “I’m really sorry about last night. It was a mistake, and I—”

“A mistake?” he interrupted as he crossed his arms over his broad chest, obviously offended.

I swallowed the huge lump that had grown in my throat before I answered, “It’s just that I can’t get involved with you—with anyone.”Even though I want to.

“Why not? If you’re worried about commitment, don’t. I’m not the commitment type,” he replied flippantly.

“Oh, so, you just want a one night stand?” I asked incredulously. When he cocked his eyebrow up with a smirk, I continued, “No, thanks.” Rolling my eyes, I started to put my earbuds back in so I could ignore him.Did he really think I was that easy?

“We’ll see about that,” he smugly responded before playing with his tongue ring. My eyes immediately went to his mouth.Fuck me.“Have a good workout.”

Baffled, I watched him stride away, wondering what the fuck just happened—again. Placing my headphones back in, I resumed my exercise as I tried to forget about Ryker.Yeah, good luck with that.

Thoughts of having sex with him filled my head, and I seriously contemplated having a one night stand with him.Maybe that would get him off my mind.My mind warred as it debated the pros and cons, and unfortunately, the cons outweighed the pros. I’d have to tell him all of my rules before we even got naked, and he probably wouldn’t want to have sex with me after that since most guys didn’t want to fuck with rules involved. I was lucky that Bryce was so understanding, otherwise I’d be stuck with a vibrator to get off.

But the thought of Ryker’s body pressed against mine, of feeling him inside me, of tasting and touching every inch of his skin, was almost enough to change my mind—almost. I had to stay in control, not be ruled by my emotions; I couldn’t let them overtake me. Opening myself up to Ryker, even just to have sex, could have irreparable consequences that I was incapable of dealing with.

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