Page 57 of Knight Life In Vegas

“We have to go to work soon,” said Eduardo. “You’re welcome to come by the arena and we can discuss employment more.”

I nodded, too cowardly to meet their eyes. What must they think of me for letting Andrew derail my career? His pressure had started so small, little complaints, guilt trips when I got back after dark or had competitions on weekends he wanted me to mingle. It had gotten worse and worse, eventually playing into unfounded insecurities that I wasn’t being safe with my bodyriding horses and that was why I wasn’t able to get pregnant early on.

I had bowed to his pressure, no matter how much I hated it. It was never worth the fight. I knew the alphas would have questions, but I didn’t have it in me to answer them yet. My children were a convenient excuse to escape, and I seized it with both hands.

They chattered away in the back seat the entire drive, talking about how fun it had been to have the alphas there. I got a kiss from each of them before they bolted into the school, leaving me alone with my mixed-up emotions to cry in the drop-off lane until enough dirty looks chased me away.

I should have gone to the arena, but I wasn’t ready to face my matches. Maybe tomorrow I would be strong enough.

“You’re doing the right thing, sir,” Autumn insisted. “I promise I’ll hold down the fort while you’re in Vegas.”

“I know you will.” If anyone could keep the company running smoothly, it was Autumn. I wasn’t worried about her handling things. She knew the company inside and out, knew everyone she’d have to coordinate with while I was working remotely.

“Has the medication been helping at all?”

“Not really.” In a desperate bid to make this trip to Las Vegas impermanent, I’d spoken with my doctor about mitigating the symptoms, but in cases like these only one true solution existed.

My omega.

It shouldn’t even bother me. It was genuinely nothing compared to the agony of when I had lost Emily, but apparently I had grown weak and complacent since then.

“I know it’s not professional,” said Autumn, “but can I give you a goodbye hug?”

Autumn was an omega, and for the most part her requirements for affection were never brought up at the office, but I supposed I could indulge her since I wasn’t sure the next time I would see her in person. “If you’d like.”

Her petite form slammed against me, arms wrapping around my chest like a vice. “Good luck out there. I know it’s not what you want, but I believe in second chances. I don’t think the universe would be so cruel as to take your omega so young and then force you to live the rest of your life alone.”

When she stepped back, her eyes were shiny. She was such a force of nature in the day-to-day, and I didn’t think I had ever seen her cry before.

I chose not to acknowledge her statement because of the clash of hope and guilt that it might be true. Instead, I focused on what I was best at. “There’s a hefty raise in your future if you can run a tight ship.”

“You won’t have to worry about a thing,” she promised. “Now go catch your flight.”

We’d told the company I had family matters to attend to, which wasn’t untrue. Charlotte and her children were sort of family in a convoluted way that hurt my brain to think about. I was definitely going to have to ramp up my therapy sessions if I was going to see my son more regularly on top of dealing with the Charlotte situation.

Somehow, knowing I was drawing closer to my omega sent my body into overdrive. It was ridiculous. How could my very cells know the miles between us were disappearing as the plane took off? How could it know that in mere hours I would be able to breathe in the scent that smoothed down all my rough edges and let me feel hope for the future for the first time in decades? The scent-marked shirt she’d given me had helped in some ways, but in others it made my body even more furious that she wasn’t tucked into my arms.

I was restless the entire flight, barely able to contain myself: my hands shaking, my palms sweating, and my chest growing tight as the little plane icon zipped across the screen.

By the time we landed in Las Vegas, I was half convinced I was descending into cardiac arrest.

I messaged Charlotte as we taxied up the runway.

Beau:

I’ve landed. Are you available to meet in an hour or so?

I had forwarded my flight details before leaving so she knew when I would arrive. She’d seemed open to seeing me. A blessing, considering I needed her to feel normal. As much as I didn’t want the match, it was still preferable to locking myself in a hotel room to suffer.

Charlotte:

I’m just running errands. Traffic is heavier than I expected so you might beat me back to the apartment.

Beau:

I’ll see you there.

I collected my luggage at baggage claim, the essentials of my life boiled down into two suitcases and a carry-on. I couldn’t decide if that was pathetic or efficient. For the sake of my ego, I went with efficient.

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