Page 70 of All Hallows Trick

“Fuck,” Tor said in a quiet, strangled voice, scrubbing his face with both hands.

[“Death gods don’t have spirits, lioness,” Madde explained softly. “We’re given this half-life as gods, but when we’re gone, we’re gone. I like to think we move onto the special place mortals go when they’ve earned a pleasant afterlife.”]

“Un-fucking-likely,” Tor muttered. “What’s pleasant about infecting humans with torment and madness?”

“Unpleasant but necessary,” Madde pointed out in the softest voice I’d heard him use. “Even if it’s unlikely, it’s better to believe he’ll go somewhere good. I hope he’s frolicking with a whole herd of those otters he likes.”

“Prairie dogs,” I corrected, on the verge of sobbing. This was supposed to work. It was supposed to bring him back. Had Cruelty tricked me? And why was I surprised if she had? She was the embodiment of cruelty; of course she’d lied to me. I squeezed my eyes shut, tears escaping between my eyelids, and flinched at the heavy feel of death all around us. I was so attuned to the sickly weight of it that I jumped when a crack formed in it and all at once it shattered.

My eyes flew open at the same time Misery dragged in a huge, rattling breath, his golden eyes wide, gaunt face taut with an expression of panic and shock.

“You’re okay, you’re okay,” I promised, stroking his face over and over, my hands shaking. “You’re going to be just fine. You’re going to be perfect.” My voice broke, my throat so tight it strangled my words.

“Cat?” he breathed.

“I’m here. Death and Tor are right here. Madde, too.”

His eyes were wild, his breathing coming in short, rapid breaths. I sat back a little so Tor and Death could get closer, and he devoured the sight of them with frantic eyes as Death stroked hair back from his face. Tor slammed his mouth into Misery’s with a desperation that hit me right in the heart.

“Calm down,” Tor grunted. “You’re fine, we’ve got you. No need for hysterics.”

“Fuck,” Miz rasped, “you.”

Tor laughed weakly. “Maybe when you’re better.”

“Are you in pain?” Death asked urgently, his voice full of devastation. I squeezed his arm, my heart a tight, painful knot behind my ribs. I didn’t want to walk away. I wanted to stay right here, where I belonged.

“No pain, but I feel hungover as fuck,” Miz replied, his eyes heavy with tiredness. “And my body feels like lead.”

Tor picked up Miz’s arm and dropped it against the bed. “Arm looks fine to me.”

Miz shot him a glare, the expression so normal that my chest squeezed and a sob escaped. “Come here, my universe,” he sighed, fluttering his fingers at me.

I wanted to throw myself upon him but I forced myself to be careful, to handle him with care. I settled against his chest, my head tucked under his chin, and the pain in my chest became unbearable when he wrapped both arms around me. I knew Tor felt my pain because he stroked my hair, untangling the bloody strands so carefully I didn’t feel a single pinch on my scalp. I was going to miss them so much. I couldn’t bear it.

“I’m alright,” Miz murmured against my forehead, brushing a kiss over my skin, his lips a gift I never thought I’d receive again. Tears burned their way out of my eyes, soaking into the soft cotton of his white shirt, and then I was sobbing hard, my broken heart on display for all my men to see. “I’m really okay,Cat. I could feel it before—the sickness, the fatigue—but it’s gone. I’m okay, we’re all okay.”

But my heart was breaking, and I didn’t want to go. I wanted to stay here in his arms, safe in the room with all four of my men. Yet, I’d made a bargain with Cruelty and I knew she wasn’t a woman to cross. If I didn’t go back to her, she’d rip Miz from us, and there’d be no coming back from that death.

I lifted my head to kiss him, a shard of pain driving through my heart, deeper and deeper with every brush of his lips over mine, every taste of him that filled my senses, every gasp of sweet, floral violets I drew into my lungs.

“I love you so much,” I said in a tight, small voice. “You’re not allowed to leave this world, do you hear?”

“I hear you,” he agreed so tenderly a fresh wave of tears spilled, hot and stinging. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Never,” I insisted, my voice strangled until it was painful to speak.

I had to leave now, even if it killed me, even if I wanted to scream and rage and tear down this whole castle at the thought. If I didn’t leave now, I never would, and who knew what Cruelty would do if I broke our agreement?

Even if she scared me, even if she was the last person I wanted to be near, she’d given me the knowledge to save Miz. I’d felt how close he was to slipping away forever, and without Cruelty, we’d have lost him.

I ignored the way my stomach knotted and the sobs trapped in my chest, piling up, crowding the space inside my ribs until they hurt. After a final kiss, I dragged myself away from his warm body, using every last bit of strength to put space between us.

“I’ll go tell everyone downstairs you’re okay. They’re all worried about you.”

“Little bride,” Death began, but I held up my hand as I slid off the bed, every inch of space I put between us like another gouge ripped in my heart.

“I just need a moment,” I breathed, the words cutting me as they left my tongue. I swore I tasted blood. “I’ll be alright.”

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