Page 14 of Entombed In Sin

“Beatrix, I…” The pastor, myfriend, looks back at me. The corners of his mouth hang down as he licks his lips. “I couldn’t let a mistake ruin him. He can’t have that on his record, and he’d implored me to help him. So I… I had the cop destroy your statement. But to make up for that, I forced Trevor to go to adivinity school and really immerse himself into learning God’s scripture. He came back a year later as a better man, Beatrix. When he told me he apologized to you when you came home from college a few months back and you had accepted it—I was thrilled. Then, a few weeks later, he told me he wanted to do right by you and date you properly. That God showed him you were special. I thought everything had turned around, that what I did was right.”

Every word out of Pastor’s Michaels’s mouth is a stab to my breaking heart.

Itrustedthis man with my life. For all the time I’ve known him, he’s always been one of the only people who would walk around town by my side without being ashamed. He stood up for me when people were cruel, and he always had something nice to say. But his kindness has been a facade. A lie. Pastor Michaels never cared about me. This man of God has gone out of his way to diminish what his son did to me. Tried to downplay the assaults as if they were nothing. He even went as far as to hide the legal trail I created in order to stop Trevor. It’s clear his son lied to him—there was never any apology made and there certainly had been no drinking or party where he claimed the second assault took place—and it was obvious Pastor Michaels didn’t care much about the details. He heard his son’s version of the story and decided Trevor was too precious to let get into trouble. That my suffering wasn’t as important as his son’s future.

This is the man who claimed he only wanted the best for me.

Tears sting my eyes. I look down at where Pastor Michaels holds my hand. How could he do this to me?

“All this to say, Beatrix, when Sheriff Heins asked me about the note and what it meant, I told him the truth. I wasn’t thinking clearly when I did. If I had, maybe I would’ve remembered that the Haggardy’s were standing just a few feetaway, listening. You know how they are when it comes to gossip.” He grimaces.

I do know how fast gossip flies here. Nausea rocks my stomach as I think about how everyone will know what Trevor did to me.

“Knowing that, I’m here asking, no,imploringyou, to reassure people that Trevor did right by you and that you two were on good terms,” Pastor Michaels continues, his words coming out faster as he speaks in earnest. “I can’t let Trevor’s reputation get sullied. If the people in Chasm believe that he was capable of something that hideous, it’ll destroy his memory here. It doesn’t help that Officer Hein’s kid, Sebastian, has been MIA. He thinks Sebastian took off because he was afraid Trevor was going to say something, and he’d have to deal with the backlash from everyone in town. The guilt my son must’ve been feeling…Of course,he would confide in his friend that he might confess what they’d done to you! But for Sebastian to leave Trevor to face their crimes alone? Disgusting… Anyway, Officer Heins thinks his son isn’t coming back. Honestly, Chasm can think what they want of him, but Trevor? I just… I just can’t let his name become tarnished in such a way.”

Oh…Thisis why he hurried to Bright Starr to speak with me. It’s not because he cares that the horrible things his son did to me are now public knowledge. Oh no, that would be just too kind and my world isn’t filled with kindness.

A full-body flinch rushes through me. Pastor Michaels wants me tolieabout Trevor. To let the world know that he couldn’t possibly be a rapist. That what he’d done was nothing. The tears that have welled up spill over. They fall, landing on my arms and wrists.

“I know, I know, this is hard. His loss will be felt by everyone,” Pastor Michaels says, taking my tears for grief. “I know you’ll do right by him. He adored you, he just had a funnyway of showing it. I thought that one day you two might marry, you know?”

The tears come to a halt. Anger, so bright and scalding that it steals my breath away, barrels through my veins, scorching away the hurt.MarryTrevor? The thought is so revolting that another flinch rushes through me. How dare he bring this up after confessing to gaslighting me for years?

“I’ll need to figure out his service arrangements. There's already a funeral taking place this Sunday. I suppose I could do it afterward, but … I don't know, I'll figure it out. Either way, I'll have his ashes buried next to his mother and the rest of the family. Have you already... have you cremated my son yet?” he asks, his voice breaking as he looks up at me.

I shake my head, unable to speak. Rage wipes away my guilt for this man's suffering and leaves me tongue tied as I fight the urge to scream at him. To call him out on his hypocrisy to the god he serves and to the people he leads. Pastor Michaels's confession hurts more than anything his son has ever done to me.

“Ok,” he nods. “Can you be the one to do it? I need it to be you that oversees the care of his body, not one of these new owners. The connection you had with Trevor… knowing you’re looking after him will make all of this a little easier to swallow.”

Internally, I scream. Although the sound is contained, it still rattles through me. It’s enough to cause my vision to blur and my heart to stutter. I lose more feeling as the numbness creeps up my wrists and into my arms. Before I can muster up a response, the gentle recorded bell tolls throughout the funeral home.

I cringe at the sound, as does the pastor. The door to the office opens and Thatcher walks in. I look away from the Hunt twin as his gaze lands on my face. I can’t face him right now. Too much has happened between us for me to trust him with this new betrayal I’m facing. It’s too raw and painful to entrust a manlike Thatcher—whose words are both beautiful and terrifying, whose touch can unravel my sanity and leave me breathless. Somehow, Thatcher is both talented and dangerous enough to strip away everything from me and still make me feel like I’m being given something in return. I just need to process this on my own.

“I'm sorry to interrupt, but?—”

“No, no! You’re not interrupting. We were just finishing up.” Pastor Michaels squeezes my hands before he lets them go and stands. “I’m so glad I have you to lean on for this, Beatrix.”

I can’t look up at him or speak. Instead, I simply stare where he had been sitting. My mind tries, and fails, to wrap around what I’ve heard and to make sense of what I know of the pastor.

Pastor Michaels pats my shoulder as he moves around me and heads for the door.

“Here, I'll walk you out,” Thatcher offers.

The door barely closes before I'm on my feet. My internal scream wells up in my throat, and for a second, I consider letting it out. Maybe I'll feel better? Or maybe I'll feel worse since it will get me nowhere. Without thinking, I reach down to grab for the decorative star sculpture sitting on the coffee table. Maybe throwing it might help. But as I wrap my bandaged fingers around it, the pain from them causes me to stop.

I can't even throw something to relieve the pent-up energy.

The thought only pisses me off further.

What am I doing here in Chasm? In a town full of horrible people? Living with Patrick's kids who allowed their boyfriend to nearly kill me? What. Am. I.Doing? How do I escape this fucking hell?

The door opens and the absolute last person I want to see steps inside. Knox freezes when our eyes meet.

“Oh, hey. I thought the room was empty now. Is, ah, everything ok?—?”

All the hatred and hurt churning around inside of me can’t be contained any longer. Like a fuse being lit, I can feel everything inside me ready to blow. Trembling with unbridled fury, I yell at him.

“GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT!”