Page 81 of Rage

Hendrix chuckled, shaking his head.

Parker was my other sweetheart, not usually the one to make rude comments. But we were all under stress lately and trying to give him the space he needed. It came with strained jokes that I didn’t actually think were jokes. He was hiding behind them, unwilling to express his true emotions.

Calder’s grip on me tightened. He didn’t want to let me go, and I couldn’t blame him. He was too warm in this chilly weather to let go.

Shane entered last, closing the door behind him. He dropped a load of groceries on the floor. His bookbag landed next, then hekicked off his snow boots. His lips furrowed as a shiver ran down him. “Fucking hate the snow.”

I giggled, pressing a kiss to Calder’s mouth before climbing off his lap. He was the one who got the most jealous if I didn’t give him the attention he needed. It didn’t make sense, when he was also the one who enjoyed sharing me the most, too.

I headed for Shane. “You can stay inside the entire weekend,” I said, kissing his cheek. “I’ll keep you warm.”

His eyes darkened when they raked over my body. I wasn’t sure what he was picturing, but I knew it wasn’t me standing in front of him with the fluffy blue snowsuit that currently covered me from head to toe. There were no curves to appreciate in this thing.

“I’ll get dinner going,” I said, grabbing the groceries.

Shane nodded, helping me with the bags I left behind. We settled into a comfortable silence while he unloaded bags and I searched for the dishes I needed to make chili. The other guys were unloading the rest of our luggage. They came up and down the steps periodically, always coming into the kitchen to steal kisses or hugs as they passed through.

An hour later, the aroma of chili was filling the air, and my stomach was grumbling. Christmas music played from the stereo I brought with us on the kitchen bar. Shane and the rest of the guys had migrated to the game room. Their voices were loud, and I smiled as I heard them joking with each other.

My heart swelled with emotion. Those four men were more than just friends. They were brothers who served in a war together. Brothers who had been through hell and back both inside and outside of the military. And now, they were mine.

I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing away the tears as I set the table for dinner. My hormones were still crazy from the miscarriage I had seven weeks ago, so I blamed the crying onthat. But then, the crying grew worse as I thought about that heartbreaking time.

We’d been so excited to tell Paisley she was going to be a big sister, but then I was hospitalized while we lost our baby. I never wanted to experience a loss like that again.

Warm hands wrapped around my stomach, pulling me into a hard chest. My eyes were still closed, and I inhaled his smell. Cherries and bourbon. Hendrix. My fixer.

His lips pressed to my temple. “Why are you crying, kitten?”

I cleared my throat, resting my hands over his on my stomach. “I miss Paisley,” I said.

And well, it wasn’t a complete lie, because I was missing our daughter, who was currently in California for the week visiting her grandparents with my ex-boyfriend,—her father—Kyle.

Hendrix didn’t need to know that I was crying for the baby. We were here to help move on. I didn’t want to put the burden of my sadness on them. Not this weekend.

His hands moved to my shoulders. “I miss her too. She’d like this place.”

“She would,” I agreed. “She’d love it. We need to bring her back.”

“We will, baby. Do you need help with anything?”

I spun, so we were face to face. My lips brushed against the dark scruff on his cheek. “Grab drink orders for me?”

“Sure,” he said.

“Dinner will be ready in ten.”

He nodded, disappearing back to the game room, and I was left to put myself together before the rest of my guys came out to find me a shattered mess.

Chapter Five

Calder

“Have you seen Thea?” Hendrix asked, entering the game room.

I pulled my gaze from the T.V. to see him changed in his pajamas, his hair wet from a shower.

I shrugged. “She said she was getting changed. You didn’t see her upstairs?”

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