“I’ll guide you through it,” Brandon said, his voice husky.
I fumbled with the button on Brandon’s jeans, my hands shaking. I hoped I could do this. I hoped I got it right. I pulled down his jeans and briefs together and with a sharp, sudden tug. Brandon leaned back, and I considered his cock. I had no idea what to do with it. Would he even fit in my mouth? I’d never tried sucking a man off before. For a fleeting second, I thought of the few women who’d sucked me off over the years.
“As long as you don’t bite me, it’ll be fine,” Brandon said.
I laughed, but when I looked up to meet Brandon’s eyes, another shiver shot down my spine. I swallowed hard and leaned my head down. Using my hand, I guided him into my mouth. I tried to mirror his movements, swirling my tongue around his tip.
“Just take your time,” Brandon said.
My face warmed when I thought of how he must be looking at me. He was hard already. Maybe my inexperience wouldn’t matter so much. I took him more into my mouth, parting my lips.
“Are you all right?” Brandon asked soothingly.
I nodded; the motion awkward with him still in my mouth. I breathed in deep through my nose, taking in the tangy smell of sweat and sex. God, I was atrocious at this. Still, I persisted. I took my hand around Brandon’s shaft and stroked him, while I tried to put him further into my mouth. I’d only taken him about halfway in when I felt him press against my gag reflex. I movedmy tongue, circling around him. He seemed very…thick, not that I had any experience regarding the size of men’s cocks.
I certainly wasn’t going to ask.
Brandon groaned, and the sound ripped through the air with the headiness of my thoughts. I licked faster and stroked harder, speeding up the same way he had. Brandon bucked his hips and shifted, groaning and moving on the sofa. For a wild second, I thought he might fall off. All at once, his muscles tensed and tightened. He made a strange noise, something between a shout and a growl. “I’m going to come, Alex,” Brandon announced, the words sounding strangely calm with his flushed face and tense muscles.
I wasn’t entirely sure what to do, keep him in my mouth or take him out? I chose the former, worried I might otherwise mess it up. Brandon came. I noticed the warmth first, then the thickness and saltiness of his semen. It was strange and unexpected; women didn’t taste like much of anything. At first, I was too startled to think much of it, but as it settled on my tongue, I decided Ididlike it. Quite a bit. The taste was strong and present, but not overwhelming. Like Brandon, in a way. This suited him well. I sucked in a deep breath, my nose filling with the tang of sweat and the scent of his cologne. Brandon grew lax against the sofa. Slowly, I tipped my head back, guiding him out. I wiped my mouth against the back of my hand, smearing his juice against the back of my hand.
“See? You’re a natural,” Brandon said.
The words barely registered. A profound and sudden tiredness pulled at me. I barely thought of anything as I lay down beside him. This had all been sudden and unexpected, but nice. So nice. I licked my lips, drinking in the last of him. I wouldn’t mind tasting him again. Far from it. Brandon shifted close to me. It seemed like no time at all that he grew still and fell asleep, and then—
Then, reality seemed to snap into place. I untangled myself from Brandon and moved away, watching him in the darkness. What had we done? What hadIdone? I should’ve been consoling him. I should’ve been making everything better, and instead, I’d just gotten caught up in it all.
And now what? Should I leave? Should I stay the night? Which was worse?
God, I worked for him, too. I was so stupid.
I pulled on my jeans and sat on the opposite end of the sofa, far from him. Desperately, I tried to salvage my thoughts, but I wasn’t having any luck. Leaving after sex would be bad; I knew that. It was better to stay and face what I’d done.
Chapter seven
Alex
The Manhattan FBI building didn’t look like much. It was dark brown and lined with rows and rows of rectangular, glass windows. But while it didn’t look like much, it wasstillthe FBI building, and by some miracle, I’d been lucky enough to get an interview. I took a deep breath and tried to muster some confidence as I walked in with my cheap suit and cellphone filled with encouraging texts from my new coworkers.
One of them was from Brandon. I shook my head and tried not to think about him; about what we’d done. Or about how I’d left like a coward before he woke up. I’d left a note, but I knew that didn’t really make everything okay.
“Thanks for the sex! It was great!”
I didn’t want to think about it in terms of sex, although—really—that was the only way onecouldthink about it. It had been amazing.
Potentiallythemost amazing sex I’d ever had.
But I wasn’t even attracted to men, or was I? Sure, Brandon was attractive, but anyone would say that. It was hard to argue that a blond-haired, blue-eyed man who clearly worked outwasn’tattractive in modern-day America.
It’d just been some harmless fun.
But if that was all it was, why did I keep lingering on it?
I greeted the secretary, who sent me to the third floor for my interview with Michelle Magaletta. The elevator ride seemed to take forever, and my feet felt as if they were lead. When I entered her office, Michelle smiled. She was a sharp looking woman with dark hair, cold blue eyes, and a serious, angular face. “Alex?”
“That’s me,” I replied.
She stood for a shake. I hoped she didn’t notice how badly my palms were sweating. “Please, sit,” she said, as she lowered herself once more to her chair.