Page 20 of Deceiving Grier

He did neither. A perplexed frown drew his brows together as if he couldn’t make sense of what I’d said—and I wasn’t sure if that was better than him laughing at me.

“Do you mean you’ve never dated anyone?” he asked.

I sighed. I should have kept my mouth shut. “No. I mean, I’ve neverfuckedanyone, and no one’s everfuckedme.”

He shrugged, still frowning. “A lot of guys aren’t into penetrative sex. It’s not that big a deal.”

“I wouldn’t know because I’ve never done it or had a blow job or blown anyone.”

“Sorry, are you telling me you’ve never hadsex?”

I really wasn’t sure how my face hadn’t burst into actual flames with the number of times I’d been embarrassed tonight. “Ding, ding, ding! Give the man a prize. We have a winner.”

Chapter Eight

Sawyer

Foralongmoment,I stared at Grier’s back as he stormed away while I tried to make sense of what he’d just told me. How in thehellhad he never had sex looking the way he did? Not that there was anythingwrongwith not having sex, if that’s what you wanted, but given the way Grier was hurrying up the street as if he were trying to outrun me and his confession, I suspected that wasn’t the case.

I jogged to catch up with him, falling into step beside him, but he made no move to acknowledge me, keeping his attention fixed forward without slowing his pace.

“So, you haven’t done anything with anyone?” I asked.

He jerked a shoulder. “A few hand jobs before I moved here.”

“But not since?” That didn’t make sense. He lived in The Square, for fuck’s sake. He was objectively hot and well-liked. He should have had no trouble getting laid if he wanted to.

Grier shook his head. “I worried that if I started up with someone, they would think it was weird when I wanted to stop, or that I did not know what to do if we did more than kiss and jerk each other off.”

He hunched his shoulders so high they almost touched his ears, as if he were trying to disappear into himself.

“Hey, you don’t ever have to do anything you’re not comfortable with,” I said, carefully, and god help anyone who had ever made him feel otherwise. “If all you ever want to do with someone is jerk them off and kiss, then that’s all you do. Who gives a fuck if someone thinks you’re weird?”

“Easy for you to say,” he muttered, as we both jogged across the intersection at the top of The Square and past the lot where Grier’s house used to be. He glanced at the fenced property, and I wondered if he missed living there.

“So, is there a reason you’re not having sex? Is it medical, or are you saving yourself?” I asked.

“You’re anidiot.” He shot me a withering glare, then turned away before picking up his pace. Any faster, and we’d be running the rest of the way home.

“Hey!” I called after him, hurrying to keep up. “I’m not making fun of you. I’m just trying to understand. Why are you getting mad?”

“BecauseI’mthe idiot. I should never have told you.”

“You don’t have to be embarrassed,” I told him, carefully. “I’m being serious when I tell you I’m not making fun of you. It’s just… you’re gorgeous, and you live in The Square. I’m pretty sure you could have found someone only too happy to help you with that particular issue. Do you not want to have sex? Because it’s perfectly okay if you don’t.”

He shot me a quick sideways glance, as if trying to gauge whether I was sincere before returning his attention to the sidewalk in front of him.

“I want to have sex,” he admitted. “Back when I was in high school, and I knew I wasn’t attracted to girls, I was too afraid to really do anything with anyone in case my parents found out.”

“Do they know you’re gay?” I asked.

“They know. I came out in my senior year of high school.”

“And it didn’t go well,” I guessed.

“No, it was fine, mostly. I mean, no one got angry or yelled or threw me out of the house or anything like that, but they were definitely disappointed.”

“I’m sorry,” I said, looking over at him, but his attention remained on the sidewalk, his expression inscrutable.

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