It’s been over a week since Thanksgiving. A week of coexisting side by side and we’re both still alive. I think that’s an accomplishment, especially after the way things played out after Monopoly.
We haven’t spoken about anything non-work related so I haven’t had the chance to clear the air with her. She seems to be avoiding me as much as possible, and I don’t know if it’s because she’s still annoyed over the game fiasco or because she came to the conclusion that our ‘closeness’ was inappropriate.
Either way, I shouldn’t be focusing on her. The Spartans lost the Sunday after Thanksgiving, but we just won against the Bandits, which is pretty much how our season has been going this year. I should be focusing on strategies to get us winning every game, consulting with the coaches, making sure they have the resources to build and train a championship team. But, I’m constantly thinking of ways to be alone with her.
If I ask her to come into my office, she leaves the door open and always seems to get a phone call about five minutes into whatever fake meeting I’ve arranged. And I know, as her boss, I could make her stay and talk to me, but I’m trying to keep my arsehole tendencies to a bare minimum around her. It’s astruggle, but an absolute necessity seeing as I want to ask her out.
But it’s even more than that. I don’t want a casual date. Dinner and a movie is far too banal for a woman like Penelope. I want to show her exactly how special she is. But I don’t know if she’ll even give me a chance now. She's sending hot and cold vibes my way and it's confusing as hell.
Contracts with end dates are much simpler to navigate. Jenson with his overactive imagination and big mouth put ideas into my head that I definitely didn’t need. But now they’re there, and I can’t seem to get them out of my head.
I want her to want me. To look at me like I hung the moon. I want to argue with her and then make her blush when I whisper something I want to do to her that’s truly obscene in her ear.
But even more than that, I want her to really bring me into her bubble of people. Because right now I feel like I’m teetering on the edge of it, with one foot in already but precariously close to being pushed out again.
Like when we both ended up at Hank’s bedside after his operation a few days ago. She was fussing over him so much I could see he was getting annoyed, so I tried to help. Fat lot of good that did me. It was the whole ‘rescuing a damsel’ speech again. Thankfully, Hank managed to intervene before an all-out war broke out in front of him.
And as much as I like her for me, I really like her for the team. She’s a good fit. I can email over a schedule to her, things she needs to do daily, and she makes sure everything is done precisely and completely. She’s a natural—dedicated, organised, and does her job even better than Hank did.
The one thing I am pissed about is I still don’t know why she left the school. We’ve both signed the NDA, but I haven’t been alone with her long enough to ask. And it’s irritating me. I want to know to slake my own curiosity, but more than that, I wanther to have someone to talk to about it. The way her eyes looked, the sadness and vulnerability she showed in my office when I first mentioned it, still haunts me.
She’s got a good support network around her—I’ve witnessed it first hand with the Bradys—yet she still feels she can’t tell them. And that kind of works in my favour. Sometimes we need someone not so close to be the ear we speak to. For some reason, it’s easier that way, less personal. Well, it was for me when I ended up spitting out my feelings to Jenson. People I’ve known my whole life still haven’t seen that side of me before. I want to be that person for her. Her confidant.
She must be lonely. She hasn’t been spending as much time with the Brady boys lately. It’s actually something they’ve complained to me about, both together and separately. She’s probably scared something will slip out. She’s still spending a lot of time with Angie, but she must miss her brothers. And I hate the idea of that.
But I can’t do anything about it now. It’s Monday night and I’m signing off to endure the Bradys and poker, grateful I don’t have to worry about sore heads too much as tomorrow is a late start.
I stride out of my office and over to the bank of lifts, stopping abruptly when I come face to face with Penelope. “Oh, I thought everyone had left.”
I wish I could step back in time a few seconds and stop that ridiculousness from leaving my mouth, but I can’t. I shake my head to clear the fog that hinders my brain every damn time I see her.
“I forgot my phone so had to come back and grab it.” She waves the phone at me and grimaces at her actions.
A little smug reassurance flows through me knowing I’m not the only one affected by whatever this shit is between us. She offers a curt smile and turns her back to me as the doors slideopen. For a brief second I consider going back to my office and avoiding her altogether, but she looks over her shoulder, lowers her lashes and smiles at me.
Without a conscious thought, my feet follow after her and I’m hitting the button for the ground floor. The lift doors slide closed and I take a deep breath, nerves swarming my stomach and making me feel like an inexperienced teenage boy again. The silence is deafening inside this little box as I stare at the numbers descending on the screen. She shuffles on her feet and clears her throat, of course she’s going to be the one to break the ice, gaining the upper hand once again. Not this time.
“How are you finding it?”
“Have I been doing alright?”
We both speak at the same time and she huffs a little breath at sharing the upper hand, pouting her lips and making my dick twitch imagining those lips doing more than just pouting.
“You’ve been amazing. Very efficient.” My voice is huskier than I’d like, but this woman makes me lose control of my body it seems.
“Thank you. I’ve enjoyed it so far. If there’s anything you need me to do differently, just let me know.” She tucks her hair behind her ear and lets her eyes meet mine. She’s shorter than usual and a quick glance lets me know it’s because she’s swapped her heels for a comfy pair of Uggs.
“Actually there is something. The NDA. You still haven’t told me.” I lean against the wall and watch her.
She squirms and a red blush streaks across her cheeks as she takes a deep breath. “We haven’t really had the time.” She avoids my gaze, looking around the small confinement, trying to find anything to focus on that isn’t me.
It irritates me. I want her to look at me. I want to see the need to look at me in her eyes, the same I know is in mine every time I seek her out.
A loud clang and a jolt has me reaching out to steady her as darkness envelops us. As my hand wraps around what I assume is her elbow, the emergency lights flicker on. And in the dim light, her eyes fly to mine.
“Are we stuck?”
I glance at the control panel and note that the lights are out on the screen. Just great. “It looks like it.”