Page 19 of Hold On Me

“Ah my girls… The usual for you both?” Mrs. Nelson breezes past and ushers us to our usual table. “Sit, sit. We’ll get you your drinks. Your hair looks lovely.” She winks at me and smiles. “Are you all ready for Thanksgiving? I’ve had Mama in already bragging about Pops’s culinary skills. She does the same thing every year.” She laughs softly as we grin back.

I let the grin turn into a soft smile. “She hates not being able to cook, but loves having Pops to cater to her needs.”

Mrs. Nelson nods as Angie scoffs through a laugh before smirking at me. “Oh I’m sure she does. Pops definitely caters to all of her needs, right Mrs. Nelson?”

A gasp of shock leaves my mouth but it soon turns to surprise when Mrs. Nelson cackles loudly.

“Rightly so. Us women sure know how to pick our men, Angie. They worship us and we have nothing to complain about, if you catch my drift.” With another wink she scurries off inside the bistro leaving Angie laughing hysterically and me a little confused.

“That’s what I’m talking about. In London I’d have been waiting outside for ages before I’d even got a table, let alone a drink. And I never would have been able to have that conversation with any of the owners there. This place is the best.” Angie leans back in her chair and sighs. She’s not wrong, but she’s also not completely right.

“It has its advantages. Sometimes I feel kinda trapped here.”

I let the words slip out without thinking and shoot a worried look over at Angie. No judgement or concern is written on her face, she looks at me with an open expression, her blue eyes wide and gentle, urging me to continue.

“I love it here, and I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else, but I just feel like it’s the same shit every day. Take Mrs. Nelson, for example. We didn’t even need to order. I’ve become so predictable, she knows what I want before I do. Because it’s the same every time.” Frustration drips out of me and I blow a breath through my lips.

“So order something different. Mix it up,” Angie suggests, and it just makes my frustrations worse.

“That’s part of the problem. I don’t want to order something different because what I get is delicious.” I growl as she laughs at me. “It’s not funny. I can’t put into words what I mean.”

“I think I get it.” She leans forward, the lingering smile on her lips making me frown back. “You love your town, you don’t necessarily want to leave it, but you’d like it to be shaken up a little?”

“Yes.” I slap my hand loudly on the table top, then shrink in embarrassment when Mrs. Nelson jumps next to me. “Sorry,” I mumble as she places our drinks in front of us.

“No worries, doll. Next time give me some warning before you start banging the table tops and screaming out yes, will ya?” Her wink makes me slide lower in my chair as Angie’s laughter barrels around me.

“That wasn’t funny,” I mumble over the rim of my cup and take a sip of the fresh OJ.

“Oh I disagree. I thought it was hilarious. Now, getting back to your little predicament. Don’t you think a certain tall, dark, and British dude could help you out?” She leans back, clutching at her coffee, and smirks at me from behind the cup.

“Yes. No. That’s what I’m worried about.” I squirm in my seat and rest my cheek in my hand. “What if something does happen and word gets out about it? What if it’s just physical and people think it’s more?” I don’t want anyone else comparing me to my mom, and knowing that Ben has money, power, and looks,people would think I’m only after him for status. Especially if it was just a fling.

“Screw what people think. You do you and be happy.” She hits me with a firm look, jaw set and her eyes narrowed as I scoff back.

“Easier said than done. I’ve lived here all my life, Angie. These people saw the way my mom… was.”

I grimace and swallow down the emotion clogging my throat. I wish I could tell her everything. Let her know these aren’t fears based on insecurities, they’re borne of actual recent events. But I can’t. Can I? I know the Bradys would go crazy mad and do something stupid in my ‘honour’, letting the whole damn town know what’s happened in the process. But Angie? Could I tell her and trust that she wouldn’t breathe a word of it, not even to Jenson?

I know she wouldn’t risk her visa by getting caught doing anything illegal to reap her revenge on him. And in all the years Jaxson was a douche to Edie, Angie never did anything to him without Edie’s permission. Plus, is it fair to tell her something she’d have to keep from her boyfriend?

But having someone to talk to—to just get it off my chest—especially someone who can offer trusted advice would be everything.

Screw it, she was my friend before she was his girlfriend. I’m telling her.

With a deep breath, my mind made up, I decide to bring her deeper into my circle of trust.

“There are still people who firmly expect me to follow in her footsteps.” Angie reaches over the table and grips my hand in hers. “I’ve never wanted to be like her. To have people compare me to her…” I close my eyes and lower my head, fighting the tears threatening to spill down my cheeks as Director Allen's words flow through my mind.

“Hey now, where has this all come from? You’re nothing like her. I don’t care what anyone says. You having a fling or a one-night stand with anyone would be nothing like what she did. I know I don’t know all the ins and outs, but what I do know is you’re not married with a small kid waiting at home for you. You’re not an addict either. You’re a grown-arse woman, free to live her life and make her choices without fear of judgement. You are not your mum just as much as you’re not your dad.” She squeezes my hand and I nod my head slightly. The urge to spill my secrets to her is even bigger now.

“If I told you something, something that you couldn’t tell anyone, including Jenson, would you keep my secret? I need someone on my side, but I don’t want to put you into an impossible situation.”

“You don’t even need to ask that. Sisters before misters. You have my word. And if I break it, you have permission to shave my head and tattoo the word ‘bitch’ across my scalp.”

A small chuckle falls from my lips, and with a resigned breath, I lower my head to avoid her eyes.

“I didn’t just leave the school because I wanted a new start. I was basically forced out.” She squeezes my hand, silently urging me to continue. “A parent at the school came on to me. He was quite…insistent.” Looking up briefly, I note the anger that washes over her features, but I carry on quickly, knowing if I don’t, I won’t be able to continue. “I told him no, fought him off and reported it to my boss. I thought that was the end of it. Until Director Allen called me into his office and told me I had to leave. That if I didn’t go quietly, he’d tell everyone I was the one who came onto a married man. He even used the word predator to describe me. He implied that while the people who knew and loved me would probably believe my version of the truth, nobody else would. That they’d question whether or not I was just like my mom.”

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