Page 60 of Renegade

“No problem, Raven. I’ll start going through Langley’s databases with Mark to see if anyone sounds familiar as soon as we get back to the office.”

“What offices are you working from?” Miguel asked, frowning.

“ATF,” Jarrett said, grinning. “Sarah said she’s more than happy to help out when I told her I had a friend in need.”

“Sarah Connor is our boss at the ATF,” Thayne said with a smile as he stood beside Jarrett. “She’s good people and the office is secure.”

“We’ll be back in touch with you as soon as we know anything,” Mark said, clapping Miguel on the back.

“I don’t know how to thank you, sir,” Miguel said.

I could see the raw emotion written on his face. I felt so damned grateful for them. “Me either.”

Miguel put a hand at the small of my back, as we all turned toward the door. I felt like that small gesture was his claim of ownership in front of all these capable men without making me feel like I wasn’t part of the group. It felt really, really good.

Chapter Nineteen

MIGUEL

By the time we finished with the meeting, I had hope that this case may be coming to a head. Though I still had no idea whether John was working with Cassanova and her companion, at least I knew I had good men in my corner who’d help me find out for sure. But that thought brought up another one which I’d been avoiding completely ever since spotting Sutter at the restaurant in Calabasas. We’d been neglecting the office although Raven had dutifully been keeping Judy updated as to what was happening. I thought I should probably drop Raven off at the office to fill her in because the other matter could no longer wait.

As soon as we got into the truck, I clutched my keys and turned to him. “I need to go talk to Vonne.”

His eyes widened for a second before he slowly nodded. “You want to tell him about John?”

“I think I have to. He doesn’t know anything about what’s been happening and it’s not like I can call him to fill him in on it. Plus…I think not telling him face to face would be wrong.”

“Okay then. Let’s go talk to him.”

I broke eye contact and looked straight out the windshield, curling my hand around the keys until they dug into my hand. “It’s something I have to do alone, Sunshine.” I glanced over at him. “I don’t know how he’s going to react to John being alive, and when I tell him he might be involved with a rogue CIA faction who could be hunting us, he’s going to flip out.”

I looked around, realizing what I’d just said out here in the parking lot. If there was a parabolic mic aimed our way, they would have picked up on what I just said. I couldn’t see anyone in the vicinity, but I realized I hadn’t given anything away except for possibly painting a target on Vonne’s back. In either case, it was too late to do anything about it now. John and the others would know we were trying to figure it all out anyway. It’s natural that I’d go to Vonne.

Raven frowned just the tiniest bit. I was pretty sure I spotted hurt in his eyes, but I knew I was right. If Vonne reacted badly, it was going to take everything in me to hold it together. I’d reacted badly myself, and Vonne’s reaction was going to be off the charts. I watched Raven school his features and lift his chin as he nodded. His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he swallowed.

“I completely understand, baby.” He reached for my hand, and I took it. “Did you think I was going to be upset?”

“You’re not?”

His gaze was so compassionate, I felt my throat close up. He shook his head. “Of course not.” He squeezed my hand. “You two are best friends, have been for many years. I don’t feel bad about that. I only feel bad that you’re going to have to deal with the fallout of Sutter’s disappearance once again. It’s not fair, Miguel. That’s what I’m upset about. It’s not you. It’s this whole fucking situation.”

I nodded, hearing the frustration in his voice. I felt like I was letting Raven down and that’s the last thing I wanted to do. I almost wish John hadn’t come back at all. It would have saved the man I loved so much grief, not to mention the fact that he’s still in danger. Though I didn’t think John would hurt Raven, the truth was, I didn’t even know the man anymore. The timewe served together seemed like a million years ago. The man in front of me was everything.

“I’m glad you understand.” I paused. “Do you want to grab an early lunch before I drop you at the office or I can take you home so you can get the Dodge. Whatever you want, Sunshine.”

He smiled at me. “Do you know how I feel every time you call me Sunshine?” I shook my head. “You make me feel like you cherish me…that I’m special.” I noticed the way his lower lip quivered just a little.

“I do. I hope you know I do.” I let go of his hand and started the engine. Completely dreading Vonne’s reaction.

Shortly after dropping Raven at home so he could drive himself to the office, I pulled into Vonne’s apartment building complex and parked in a shady spot in the parking lot. I steeled myself for what I was going to tell him, trying to figure out how to do it. He would be worried about my safety, but the prospect of that filled me with no joy. I wanted him to be happy that John was still alive, but he’d always been able to read my expression and tell what mood I was in, almost as well as Raven. Knowing I was concerned about what John might do to all of us, would show right through.

I’d been putting up a brave front, feeling like I should defend what Sutter had done by not coming to us sooner, trusting that whatever he’d done or whoever he’d gotten involved with, we would understand. He hadn’t believed in us and that made me sadder than I could put words or even much thought to. After leaving Raven, I’d called Vonne to ask him what time he got off work and he’d told me he was at home sleeping, having worked the night shift. I ran up to the second floor where his apartment was located as soon as he buzzed me through and knocked on his door.

He came to the door looking sleepy but smiling as always. “Come on in,” he said, blinking and yawning as soon as he opened the door. “Want some coffee?”

“Thanks.” I shut the door. “I’m so sorry, man,” I said, following him into the small apartment and heading back to the kitchen after him. It was already after twelve but he was dressed in a pair of sleeping shorts and a white tank top, looking like he’d just rolled out of bed. He probably had. When we’d been on active duty together, our whole unit had been endlessly fascinated by how Vonne could fall asleep the second his head hit the pillow and wake up with a huge grin on his face at four in the morning, ready for the day. His inner alarm clock was the only one we’d ever needed out in the field.

He turned to look at me as I stepped into the kitchen. It was neat and clean but then again, so was Vonne’s girlfriend. They’d been living together for almost eleven years, sharing an apartment ever since we’d come home from Afghanistan. I glanced around, noticing the full crockpot which was cooking something that made the whole house smell heavenly. “How you doin’, Trigg?” he asked, handing me a full cup of black coffee.

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