Page 80 of Ava: Part Two

Still, it weighed heavily on her mind that something was wrong with her, mentally and physically.

She didn’t understand what was said in any of her classes, and she had no idea how she ended up in the queue in the dining hall at lunchtime. There was a fog in her mind, and the only thing that brought her out of it was when someone touched her shoulder.

She blinked and looked up to see Derek in front of her with a frown on his face.

“Get your food, then we’ll go and eat outside,” he said.

Why? Was Zeke waiting for her?

She nodded and moved forward to start filling her tray but paused when she saw Dexter at the end of the service station. His eyes were so cold and full of hatred. She had expected this. She’d humiliated him and damaged his fragile ego. The heat from his anger would have terrified her if it weren’t for the emptiness in her chest. She didn’t even bother to look away from his gaze.

She couldn’t remember if she had lowered her gaze at all that day. Had she unknowingly broken any rules? Had she added to her detentions?

“Ava.”

At Derek’s urging, she looked away from Dexter and put some food on her tray. She still wasn’t hungry, but she knew she had to try to eat something. She needed to keep her strength up for when she escaped this place. Somehow, she ended up sitting on a bench in the Quad with the two wolves on either side of her. They didn’t speak, and she could feel the tension rolling off them in waves.

And Zeke was not there.

"Wipe your tears, Ava."

She looked at Myles with a frown until she felt the tears falling down her cheeks. Why was she even crying?

"You need to talk to Zeke. Really talk," Derek said.

But she didn't want to. She knew the moment she did, she would beg him to redo the picnic, look at her the way he had and tell her she was his.

She blinked, and she was in detention. Had she even gone to training? Mr Patrick seemed to be studying her. She had no idea what was happening in her head, so she didn't know what had given him the look on his face.

But she looked away from him to look out the window, and only moments later, Derek was helping her out of her chair. Detention was over, and both he and Myles were somehow there.

"I think I'm sick. I think something happened in Isolation," she told them.

"You're not sick, Ava. Not physically, anyway," Derek said.

She didn't have the strength to ask what the hell he meant as they led her to the car. And then she was in Zeke's bed. The cologne on his pillow failed to calm her as it usually did. Though she left the lights on, it felt like the darkness had invaded her soul. It filled her whole body, made it too heavy to move. And the nightmares... They came even though her eyes were wide open.

Blood. Screaming. Crunching sounds. Blood. Screaming. Crunching sounds.

Claws. Red eyes. Violet eyes.

Claire. Her friends.

So much blood.

When daylight streamed into the room and Derek walked into her line of vision, she could still hear it. Still see it.

And Zeke still wasn't home.

She didn't hear what Derek said. She kept her gaze outside the window, still unmoving, until the daylight disappeared and darkness started to creep in again. Someone put the light on, but it didn't help. The darkness hadn't left her, even when the sun was shining.

Zeke. Where was Zeke?

Her chest tightened, and her breathing became laboured. She knew it was the start of another panic attack.

But she lay there, still unmoving, letting it all take her over.

Maybe she would always be like this now, even if she left this place.

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