Page 45 of Gunner

“There’s nothin’ to say. I’m gonna find him one way or another.”

“Are you ready for this baby?” she asks, changing the subject. I reach over and rest my hand on her stomach as I smile.

“Yeah, I’m ready. I can’t wait to see what he looks like,” I tell her.

“Me too. I wasn’t sure I could handle this, but the more he grows inside me, the more excited I get.”

“He? You said he.”

“You’re rubbing off on me. I’m starting to think it’s a boy, too,” she laughs. I can’t stop myself. I lean in, grab her face with my free hand, and pull her toward me. I kiss her and kiss her hard. I can’t get enough of her. I can’t stop touching her. It’s like I need to feel her to know she’s real.

“What was that for?”

“For everything, Nat. You’re givin’ me everything.”

“What do you mean?”

“A second chance at life. A second chance to love.”

“You love me?”

“There’s this feelin’ in the pit of my stomach I can’t deny. When you were gone, I lost it. I couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe. If I didn’t find you, I wasn’t sure I wanted to keep goin’, Nat. I knew I had to find you because I needed you. So yeah, Nat. I love you.”

“Oh my god,” she whispers. I can’t say anything else. I just stare into her eyes. “Gunner, I …”

“I don’t need to hear it back, Nat. That’s not why I said it. We all fall in love at different times. You’re not there yet and that’s fine. I just need you to know that I’m not fuckin’ around here.”

“But I think I do love you too, Gunner. It’s just harder for me to say it, but I feel it. It doesn’t make sense. We haven’t known each other that long.”

“Our hearts know, Nat. Doesn’t matter how long it’s been. We know.” A tear spills down her cheek as she smiles at me. It’s perfect. It’s everything I could want and more. I wasn’t sure I was ready to love again. I knew I could take care of her and protect her but love her? I didn’t see that coming. But I know what I feel. I know what this is. And I love this girl. No matter how long I’ve known her. I love her.

“Are we stuck in the clubhouse?”

“Not really. Why?”

“I need to get something.”

“I can get you whatever you need,” I tell her. She smiles at me, and it melts my heart a little more.

“I think I need a break, Gunner.”

“Okay. We can do that.”

“Really?”

“Told you I’d do anything for you, Natasa. Anything.”

“Even uncomfortable things?” Now she has my interests. What does she think is uncomfortable for me?

“What do you mean by that?”

“I was talking with the other girls about when the baby is born. They said I’d need things. Like pads and breast pads in case they leak.”

“And you think I’d be embarrassed to buy them?”

“I don’t know. Some men don’t like touching that stuff,” she smiles at me.

“I’m not some men, Nat. You think walkin’ around with a box of feminine products is gonna bother me?” She shrugs her shoulders before I stand and pull her to her feet. She gazes up at me as I look down at her.

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