But he did have an effect on Nash, and he smiled as he fell bonelessly into the cushions, the scent and sounds of Vrel rutting their mate filling the room. It was nearly perfect. Once Nash joined them, however, it would be.
Chapter
Seventeen
CHAPTER 17
When the break in the weather finally came, Emily was not prepared for it. She stood outside and stared out at the quiet, pristine forest beyond their home. The snow was deep, but it was traversable. Her stomach sank with the realization that Nash could leave now… and probably should take the opportunity to leave when he could so that he wouldn’t get caught in the den with them during the Withering Nights. They were coming soon. She had overheard Vikt and Vrel quietly discussing it just the other day and how it would be difficult for Nash if he were stuck as an outsider within their den.
But… she didn’t want him to go. The den would feel empty without him. And how could she even look forward to another Mother’s Night without him there? Emily lifted a hand to her hair where the carved wooden toggle in the shape of a fish of all things held back the length with its leather strap. The gift was small and simple and offered with no little embarrassmenton his part, but she loved it and had been glad that she had separated out some gifts for him from the ones that she had prepared for her mates. Seeing his happiness as he touched them had warmed her heart as much as the pleasure Vikt and Vrel expressed. And of course she had received all manner of gifts from those two, but not one had lessened the considerate little gift from Nash—a newcomer with little to nothing of his own.
The thought of him being alone again brought tears to her eyes, immediately followed by annoyance at the thought of another female in the clan potentially taking interest in him. It could certainly happen. Her mates had told her of untraditional mating instances, solitary alpha males who had previously had their seed awakened and lost their triads mating comfortably, or a pair of males with one female. Nash could find a female who desired him easily even if he did not find a triad.
But she didn’t want him to, and she hated herself for the selfish thought. She wanted him to be happy but didn’t want to let him go despite her own fears keeping her from claiming him fully. And she was afraid—afraid that the alpha wouldn’t ultimately make her mates happy and be good for them.
The crunch of snow behind her alerted her to the lighter footsteps of her mates. Turning, she glanced over to her side as Vikt drew up beside her, his brows raising as his two nearest eyes focused on her.
“You are out here early, rya.”
She nodded. “I saw that the snow stopped.”
“So it did,” he agreed as he deeply inhaled the cold air. “It will be good to have a few days not caught within the den. We can enjoy the weather a little.”
“And Nash?” she whispered.
She felt the weight of his gaze turn on her. “And Nash, of course. There is no reason for any of us to feel as if we mustbe confined in the den right now. It is best for us all to take advantage of it.”
Emily sighed, uncertain if he was being overly literal or if he was intentionally baiting her to speak her thoughts. Either way, it was effective. “I meant to say—do you think he will leave now that the weather is nice?”
His expression turned curious. “Do you wish him to leave?”
She startled guiltily, uncertain of how to answer. “I… I’m not sure if I’m ready for him to leave,” she admitted. “But I don’t want you to feel like you are being replaced, because that is impossible. You are mine and could never be replaced in my heart,” she rushed in a panic, needing to get all the words out at once so that he didn’t think anything of the sort for even a moment.
The corner of Vikt’s mouth hitched. “Do you care so deeply about me and Vrel?”
“Of course,” she replied. How could they possibly not realize? “I love you. Both of you. That means you and me, together forever. You are an irreplaceable part of me. And because of that, you two come first. I would never intentionally make a decision that I know might hurt you.”
He nodded in response. “In that case, he should stay for as long as he is willing and as long as you desire. Vrel and I… we like him, rya.” Vikt chuffed quietly. “Thral was right in that. Nash is good for us. He completes a part of us that we did not even realize was missing. What is important now is ifyoulike him,” he rumbled, cupping her face between his upper hands.
“I think I might,” she whispered.
“Then I will stay,” a deep voice cut in.
Emily’s eyes flew over toward the entrance of the house where Nash stood tall, his eyes fixed on her as Vrel beamed happily at his side.
“How much did you hear?” she asked quietly.
A small smile pulled at the corner of his mouth. “Enough to solidify my own desire. Like Vikt and Vrel, I have found my family in these males—family that has been an open wound in my heart for much of my life. And you, Emily, are all I could have hoped for. I know that you are still uncertain, but I will stay. I will suffer anything to be here by your side until the day comes that you are finally ready to accept me as your alpha mate.”
“He can extrude to display if you need him to,” Vrel offered from his side with such enthusiasm that Emily felt heat rush into her face even as Nash’s ears twisted back in obvious embarrassment.
“That is not necessary,” she choked around a nervous laugh. “I am certain that it is quite impressive.”
“It is,” Vikt assured her mellowly but grinned when she raised her eyebrows in a silent question. “Not much goes unseen around the den, rya. Nash tries to slake his lust on the far side of the house when he thinks none of us are paying attention in the early hours, but I frequently see him when I go out early to look for game.” His eyes glowed brightly with undeniable interest. “It would be a great pleasure to see him mount you, rya. You would never again need to assist us. The thought of it…” He shivered with a sigh, his words dropping away.
“This is not quite what I was expecting,” Emily admitted as she gave Nash a shy smile. “Are you certain? From what I’m told, when the Withering Days hit can be unpredictable. With Mother’s Night having passed on the solstice, it will descend soon. There may not be another opportunity to leave if you change your mind.”
“I am certain,” he rumbled as he straightened with determination to his full height. “Your males may need to restrain me before you retire but I will gladly suffer it.”