Page 18 of Collateral Damage

Making my way down the corridor to the entrance of the room, I push the door forth causing an eerie creek to echo through the empty coffin. You could hear a pin drop it's so quiet but I can't hear her at all. Not even her breathing which peeks my worry a little. There is no way she's got out of this house unless I've completely underestimated her.

Once fully footed inside the room, my heart sinks at the memories held captive here.She loved this room. It was her escape. Now it is her grave.

Play – 'Paralyzed – NF'

Lost in thought, as I glare at the dull, burgundy stain underneath my boot, an almighty fit of rage sneaks up from behind me and as I turn around the palm of my hand is met with one ofmykitchen knives, slicing straight through it with ease as it lodges between my thumb and index finger.

“SHIT!-” Seems I did underestimate her and I can't say I've ever been nailed in the hand before.FUCK this hurts.She pushes me off balance straight into the wardrobe behind the door, too distracted by the sheer metal and red river pooling from my hand, but pain is the only way I feel.

It doesn't take me long to pull it out, feeling the sharp edge graze against my open gash making me hold my breath, clamping my teeth shut in fear of biting my own tongue off. I use my remaining force to slam the door shut with my heavy boot,trapping her in where she legs it for the other side of the room, already equipped with another blade, clinging to the chest of draws like it will help her.

I'm leant with my back against the door, the pulse in my hand pushing a flood of blood from my veins decorating the floor with my innards. She’s gawking at me and I don't think even she knew she was capable of such violence. I hate to admit how hot this is, but it's been a while since I've tasted psychical pain and my hand isn't the only thing throbbing. Her fear is bringing out her eyes and I could stare at them for hours, pools of the pain she is holding in. I can't even be mad at her for this because I get it. I wanted me dead too, but now she's made this slightly more complicated. She's gripping that knife like a timid doe as if she didn't just stab me with one but I'd prefer she put the bloody thing down.The game is over now.

I push off the door slowly, listening to the sound of my bodily fluids hitting the wooden floor, dripping in rhythmic fashion as I approach her.

“DON'T!” she's threatening me as if I should be frightened. I've seen chihuahuas more frightening than her. But it's not her threat that frightens me. It’s the way she's crumbling. She's not had a chance to grieve and it's finally catching up to her. I shouldn't have left her to her own devices unattended but that realisation is a little late now. I can't exactly say I am experienced in a parentless teen who's been held against her will…Well... Actually, now that I put it like that. I am very experienced. The difference is, I never got to grieve. I had to suck it the fuck up and take it. I wasn't allowed to feel. I never got chance to process my infliction or heal my fucking harm. She needs to snap out of this if she wants to survive.

“YOU KILLED THEM.” she's quivering and I don't even think she knows what she's doing right now but I wanna smack those tears off her fucking face and really give her something tocry about.“YOU RUINED MY LIFE.” She's not wrong. I did what I always do.I'm selfish. But I wasn't exactly expecting this to be my outcome. She will always be my own personalKarma.

“Put. The knife. Down.” I wave my bloody hand gesturing for her to give it to me but of course she will not comply. She is breaking.Good.She needs to break. She needs to get it out. She needs to feel this pain if she wants to get out of this alive. She needs to pour alcohol on her open wounds and embrace the sting, it's the first stage of healing.

“It hurts! It hurts so much. I- I can't take it!” The cracking in her voice is forming a lump in my throat. I'll be honest, this is a first for me and I feel like an inexperienced mother hearing their baby cry for the first time. Its ear fucking and grating my gears but I have this urge to find a solution to stop her from sobbing like a bloody baby.

“Why are you doing this to me!” She says this like I purposely ruined her life and kidnapped her. I'm a fucking psycho but I'm not a stalker. She's been watching too many murder documentaries. I had no interest in her, she was purelyCollateral damage.

“I told you. This was not what I wanted!”

“What now huh?! Are you just going to keep me here until I am a rotting pile of bones! Bury me in your back garden with the rest of your victims!” Her back chat is starting to rub me the wrong way. If she carries on and I will fill her mouth to shut her the fuck up,I am starting to think keeping her sedated was the better option here.

“The knifeAlora. I won't tell you again.” She's not even listening to me right now, clutching it to her chest, almost dropping it as she trembles like a scared puppy. I know there's adrenaline running through her veins. The impression I get from her is that she never had much control of her own life so I'm sortof proud right now. I'm bringing out that untamed kitten and I don't care if she hates me for it.

“I WILL KILL YOU!” This is adorable, really. But I could snap her in 0.3 seconds.Her whining is getting annoying.

“This isn't a horror movie sweetheart. If I kill you, you stayDEAD.”Like her mother.Her expression doesn’t change, she knows what I'm capable of and after last week's events I think she wants me to end her quickly.

“Good! You should have let me die! I swear to god I will make your life miserable every second, minute, hour that passes!” You know what. I don’t doubt she will. It’s been pretty dead round here so I guess she will continue to keep me busy, but if she thinks I’m going to put up with her bratty fucking behaviour she has another thing coming.

“I don't want to hurt you. Don't give me a reason to.” A spine-chilling laugh seeps from her mouth as she wipes away the grief damping her cheeks.

“You're funny…” That screamed sarcasm and I want to wrap my hand around her pretty little throat, making my face the last face she sees as I deplete her of oxygen just to show her howfunnyI can really be.“Let me out.” Her incessant whining is pushing me to a point I really don’t want to reach. Does she really think I'm going to just open that door and let her waltz free? If that was the case I would have done so already.

“Just give me some time. I need time to get my shit together and I will let you go. You'll never have to see me again.” I bite creeping forwards, prowling her into the corner of the room where she attempts to threaten me further. I can feel her anger consuming the room like gas, it’s becoming harder and harder to breathe. Harder to predict what she is going to do next.

“NO! You don't get to run away from this! I will kill you myself if the cops don't get there first!”

I gently huff in response, making it known that her threat is nothing but useless. There are no houses for miles. We are in the middle of butt fuck nowhere. This place has been abandoned for years after the murders and allegations; people avoid these parts like the plague. If she thinks anyone is coming for her, she is more delusional than I thought. I can’t fault her for hoping though. I spent many nights in that cell hoping someone would come for me even though I had no one left to rescue me. Your mind plays with you in the company of loneliness. Your demons begin to take up residence and play the angel in its absence.

“No one is coming for you. You can kick, scream, yell all you like. The windows are boarded up and we are the only sliver of life for miles. So you can either play ball and I can try and make this as comfortable for you as possible, or I can make this ugly. It's your choice.” She doesn’t quite realise just how lenient I am being with her right now which has proven to do nothing in my favour.

“FUCK YOU!” She screams with malice and I am boiling under my flesh. She knows I don't do kindness. Lucky for her I don't put my hands on women. Not unless self-defence is necessary and I feel there may be quite a lot of that if she carries on being a spoiled little brat, yet by the way she is directing that knife, I don’t think she intends on being here much longer.

“Put the fucking knife down. Before I have to get physical.” I take another step, holding my arms out to cradle her distress as she reaches forward, attempting to stab my other hand before sitting the tip of the blade against her prominent vein sat flush beneath the skin of her wrist.“Say you did kill me. Then what? Then you'd sit behind bars for murder.” I wave my hands in the air to mimic surrender, challenging her at her own morals in this very moment. Fear makes us see them in a different light when you're pushed to meddle between life and death, it makes youcommit acts of sin in the name of survival, it makes you kill just to save your own skin.

“I would claim self-defence!” She exclaims. A vindictive cackle bursts from my throat, tilting my head to the ceiling, sighing at the irony. The naivety she still possesses even now. Even though I'm showing her how dark life beyond her perfect little world can be. She still seeks safety in the very system created to break us.

“You know what? They would probably believe you too.” I shake my head in despair smiling at her hopeful statement, finding amusement in how history has a way of repeating itself.Self-defence.Of course that would work in her favour. She wears no badge but she's still the daughter of an ex-detective who used the same excuse and got away with it.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?!” She questions, sensing my mockery and my bitterness as I laugh at her for being so fucking foolish.

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