Page 61 of Only Ever His

A dinner he’d been talking about all week, something he’d clearly put thought into.

But after everything that had happened today, I couldn’t face him.

I couldn’t deal with his steady gaze, his quiet intensity, or the way he looked at me like I was the most important person in his world.

Not when I felt like I was about to fall apart.

My thumbs hovered over the screen before I finally typed out a message.

Tori:I think I need some time tonight to myself. Sorry about canceling last minute. I’ll talk to you later.

I hit send beforeI could overthink it, my stomach twisting with guilt as the message disappeared into cyberspace.

Cole would be disappointed—I knew that. And maybe even hurt. But I needed space to sort through this mess in my head.

The phone buzzed almost immediately, his reply lighting up the screen.

Cole:I understand. Take the time you need. Just… let me know if you’re okay, Tori.

Tears burned my eyes,but I blinked them back.

He wasn’t pressuring me, wasn’t demanding answers or insisting on talking things through.

He was giving me exactly what I’d asked for—space. But instead of relief, all I felt was an ache in my chest.

The hours draggedas the evening crept in.

I tried distracting myself—cleaning, organizing my closet, even attempting to read a book. But nothing worked.

My thoughts kept circling back to Cole, to the look on his face when I walked away earlier.

He had been frustrated, yes, but there had been something else there too. Vulnerability.

For all his confidence and self-assuredness, Cole Valen wasn’t infallible.

And the more I thought about it, the more I realized he was probably wrestling with his own demons just as much as I was.

Marcus’s voice echoed in my mind, unbidden.

You’re impossible to love, Tori. Too high-maintenance. Too fragile. No one will ever put up with you the way I do.

I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the memory away.

But it clung to me like a second skin, a reminder of every insecurity Marcus had planted and nurtured over the years.

And now, those same insecurities whispered that maybe Cole would realize I wasn’t worth the effort.

That I’d push him away too many times, and he’d give up on me.

Was I ready for this? To let someone in, knowing I might ruin everything?

The sun had long since set by the time I finally stepped out onto my balcony.

The cool night air brushed against my skin, and I hugged my arms around myself, staring out at the quiet street below.

My phone sat on the table beside me, its screen dark and unassuming.

A part of me wanted to call him, to tell him I was sorry for canceling, that I wanted him here.

---