Page 62 of Before the Storm

“I’ll come to Nantucket,” Winnie said firmly.

“You don’t have to do that. I’m sure you have a life, a job, and things to do,” Tara said.

“But you can’t leave Aunt Josie right now,” Winnie reminded her. “It’s easier if I come up.”

Tara lay back on the bed. She felt exhausted and haggard, and she was suddenly worried that Winnie would take one look at her and thinkwow, my mother has gotten so old.

But aging was a gift. Tara knew that now better than ever.

“There’s something I should tell you before we see each other,” Winnie said softly. “It’s sort of the reason I startedreaching out in the first place. I mean, it’s the kind of life-altering event that forced me to reckon with the past and what I did to you and how I handled it…”

“You were a teenager, Winnie. I was the adult. I should have handled it better.” Tara bit her lower lip. “I’m sorry. I’m really just so sorry.”

Winnie hesitated. Tara knew she’d broken their “rules.” Winnie wanted to talk about all this later when they weren’t on the phone. She wanted it to happen face-to-face.

“I’m sorry,” Tara said again, but this time it was for breaking their conversation rules.

“It’s fine,” Winnie said. “But I wanted to tell you I’m pregnant. I’m six months along.”

Tara was on her feet again, smiling like a fool. “You’re pregnant?”

Immediately, Tara was filled with images of when she’d first learned she was pregnant with Winnie—how frightened, thrilled, and exhilarated she’d been. She’d had to drop out of college. She’d had to make plans.

Her entire life had changed. She didn’t regret a thing.

“I just can’t believe it,” Tara kept saying because she couldn’t think of anything else to say. “I’m so happy. I’m just so happy.” Tears spilled down her cheeks. “Honey, I want to see you right away.”

Laughter bubbled in her chest and stomach. Winnie promised she’d make flight arrangements to Nantucket, and then Tara fought with her about how late it was in her pregnancy. Should she really fly? Winnie googled it again and confirmed it was fine, and Tara said, “I just really don’t want to risk it.” They fought about that for a little while before Winnie talked her down again. “All right,” Tara stammered. “But I’m happy to come pick you up. Any time.”

Before they hung up, they told one another they loved each other for the first time in eight years.

It nearly toppled Tara over.

The immensity of the joy she was experiencing was almost too much. She felt as though she couldn’t trust it, as though Winnie was going to call her again and say April fools. But it wasn’t April. It was January, and she was in Seattle with her mother and sister, and not all was lost. Not yet.

But for whatever reason, she stopped herself from telling Josie about Winnie’s trip to Nantucket.

Maybe it was manipulative. But it was the last tactic she had to convince Josie there was more to life than what she’d had.

Tara decided she wanted Winnie’s visit to be a surprise.

Chapter Nineteen

February 2025

Nantucket Island

It surprised Josie how much strength she had when the three of them got back to Nantucket. Standing at the far end of a wintry beach after a brisk walk, she gazed back at the house. Tara and Cindy were bundled up in the sunroom, watching the water and drinking tea. From where she was, Josie felt as though she could pretend it was any other year on Nantucket. She could pretend that Winnie would scamper outside at any minute and demand that Josie make snow angels with her.

What is the meaning of my life?she wondered now. Did I do enough? Did I love enough?

Am I proud of the decisions I made?

Another blast of wind came across the beach and ripped into her, and she was suddenly terribly cold, eager for a mug of tea or cocoa.

When she returned to the house, she found the year just as she left it, with forty-four-year-old Tara, sixty-six-year-oldCindy, and a drafty house that often felt way too big for all of them. It needed to be filled with the generous spirit of a child, as it once had been.

Maybe Tara would sell it after Josie was gone.

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