Page 17 of Before the Storm

“He always did,” Josie said.

Tara held the silence for a second. It was difficult for her to think back about their parents. She still hadn’t seen them since 2001.

It was hard to believe they’d ever really loved her. It was hard to believe they’d ever shown such tenderness.

Eventually, Tara pulled up a chair next to Josie’s bed. “What can I get you?” Tara asked. “Tea? Water?”

“Tea sounds lovely,” Josie admitted.

Tara hurried into the kitchen to make them both mugs of fennel tea. Once there and alone, she let herself cry quietly. Her chest heaved. But by the time she returned, she’d planted a smile on her face and decided to be brave for her sister. She’d decided Josie wasn’t allowed to die.

“Tell me,” Josie said as she sipped her tea, “how is Nantucket?”

“It’s the same,” Tara offered. “It never really changes.”

“Not like this city,” Josie said. “It changes a thousand times every minute.”

“How do you keep up?”

“I stopped trying to,” Josie said. “But sometimes my stepdaughters visit. Sometimes they tell me what’s going on.”

Tara hated that word sometimes. It was difficult to know how often Josie’s stepdaughters really came by. Didn’t they love their stepmother? Didn’t they care that she was wasting away?

Finally, Tara pressed Josie for more information about the cancer.

“I was diagnosed in summer,” Josie explained. “We caught it late. I’d had a few health problems, but nothing major. Truth be told, I was avoiding the doctor like the plague. We tried radiation and chemotherapy, but the cancer spread anyway. They said there’s nothing they can do.”

Tara raised her eyebrows.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Josie ordered. “I’m telling you, I’ve made my peace with it. I’m on my way out.”

“I told you about the doctors in Nantucket,” Tara protested.

“And I’m telling you that I don’t want to hear anything else about them.”

Josie seemed resolute. But Tara was just as stubborn, if not more. It was a face-off. Tara was sure she’d win. She could practically see them three years from now, sharing a bottle of wine on a Nantucket veranda, talking about how Tara had forced Josie to survive.

One of Tara’s hands curled into a fist.

“But you know who I’ve been thinking about?” Josie asked. “Cindy and Bob.”

Tara grimaced. “You didn’t reach out to them, did you?”

Josie shook her head. “No. Not yet. But they never loved me the way they loved you. Josie having cancer is no big thing in their world.”

Tara gaped at her. She wanted to say,Your cancer is world-shattering.

“But if I’m on my way out of here,” Josie continued, “I’d like to leave the world a happier and better place. You know?”

“You’re going to get a second opinion.”

Josie waved her hand. “I want us to reach out to Bob and Cindy together. I want you to mend your relationship with them. I want them to apologize to you.” She swallowed, and it looked as though it was difficult. Her face was etched with pain. “When I go, I want to know you have them again. I want to know that you feel their love again.”

Tara’s thoughts spun wildly. “I haven’t seen Cindy or Bob since 2001. And I don’t care about them.”

Even as she said it, she knew it was a lie. Her heart was heavy with the loss of her parents.

“I want you to come home with me,” Tara continued. “I have plenty of space, more than you have here. I don’t want you to be alone.”