Page 128 of At Her Will

She wanted to touch his head, give him a Mistress’s approval for his care, but she felt numb.

When she slowly extricated herself, he woke. As he straightened and came to himself, his gaze moved to her face, taking in everything at a glance. The automatic smile on his face died.

“Got this from that coffee shop you hit sometimes on the way to work.” Ros put the cups down, one near Rev, and leaned in to kiss Vera’s forehead. When she drew back, her blue eyes were measuring. From the tightening of her mouth, Vera assumed the bruising was substantial. Everything on that side of her face felt swollen. “How are you doing?” her boss asked.

“Ready to get home.” Vera cleared a thick throat and discovered it also hurt like hell to speak.

She remembered the nurse checking her vitals. Rev had accommodated her when the woman needed to take his place at Vera’s side. He’d held up the wall until she was done, his eyes always on Vera. She recalled the deep rumble of his voice, responding to the nurse. She’d offered to bring him a cot. He’d declined.

“I good, ma’am. Thank you.”

Then he’d sat his big body back in that small chair, leaned over her, taken her hand, and started praying again. Sometimes he’d knelt on the floor. But he’d stayed close, no matter what.

“The nurse said I’d be discharged this morning,” she told Ros, trying to ignore the fact that talking made her eyes water. Her face really hurt.

Ros arched a brow. “I’ll drive you home once they take care of that.”

“That would be good.”

When Rev moved to put his hand over hers, Vera lifted it to pluck at the hospital gown, as if she hadn’t noticed him reaching for her.

She didn’t pretend like that. But she needed the defense mechanism. The spell that the night, the relief at not being dead, had spun, had no hold over her in the daylight. She had no armor. Someone torturing her, trying to kill her, denying her value, meant she was floundering in a cauldron of emotions she didn’t want to examine. She was going to break if anyone wanted anything from her.

Especially him.

“Vera,” Ros spoke softly. “Look at me, dear one.”

It was an effort, but she managed. She knew her gaze was pleading for something, she didn’t know what. Fortunately, Ros did. Reminding Vera why, when she needed a leader in her life, it was usually the woman in front of her who provided that.

“You’ve always been the one who helps us when we’re adrift,” her friend said, “and we’ve learned things from you. Enough to say what you need to hear now.

“Whatever you’re feeling is okay. You’ve been through a serious trauma. It’s going to take time and counseling to help you deal with it. But today, we only have one thing to do. Get you home. I’ll get you settled, and then I’ll work from there, in your home office. I won’t bother you, but if you need anything, I’ll bethere. Tomorrow, if you want me to give you space, I will, but today, it’s best if someone is there with you. Not you.”

That last part wasn’t to her. Rev had begun to speak and, anticipating him, Ros had issued the short statement. Her expression toward him wasn’t unkind, but it was uncompromising. Pure Domme, pure CEO, pure Ros.

“Not today, Rev,” she repeated quietly. “Last night, how you felt about being here, it was right. But now, this is the right thing.”

“I understand.” His voice was tight, though, his expression the opposite of the words. He shifted his attention to Vera. “I’ll do whatever you need,” he said. “I know you not ready to talk about any of it, but I need to say one thing to you. What they…my family, did to you…it was awful. What they did to their souls by doing it… I had to go to them, had to make them see that.”

She’d flinched when he said “my family,” and he’d seen it. The pain in his gaze pierced her, and she didn’t want to feel that. “I do hear you, Rev. But I can’t handle hearing it. I’m not all right. Do you understand?”

“I do, Mistress.”

“Don’tcall me that.” The anger she felt startled her, and she shrank back, from herself as much as from him. “Please…I can’t…not right now.”

Rev rose and took a step back from the bed, even as Ros drew closer to the other side. He gazed down at the bill cap he was turning in circles, like he’d done outside her office that day. He wasn’t ashamed to meet her gaze, she knew. He was obeying her, trying not to put any pressure on her, add to her pain. If he looked at her, with all he was feeling in his eyes, that she heard in his voice, he knew he’d do the opposite of that.

Please go. Just please go.

“I understand. I don’t deserve to call you that. I didn’t serve you the way I should. And I’m part of the family who did this to you.”

He was connected to those who’d done this to her, but that was the only truth he’d spoken. But a mean, petty part of her wouldn’t contradict him on the rest. She closed her eyes, hoping when she opened them, he’d be gone. But instead, his arms slid around her. His wonderful, strong arms, that she could barely bear to touch her right now. Even so, he held her close to his chest. “I love you, Veracity. I love you.”

She nodded, a quick, reluctant thing. She was fighting not to push him away. It was barely a second before he let her go, stepped back again and turned to Ros.

“Please let me know if she needs anything…I can provide.”

She could tell leaving was terrible for him, not knowing if she’d ever want to see him again.

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