Page 90 of On The Beach

"She loves her work more than she wants a life with me."

Franco snorted, raising his drink with a wry grin. "If that's what you believe, you, mate, are an even bigger idiot than we thought."

I chuckled despite the knot twisting in my gut. "Hey, at least I'm a well-intentioned idiot."

Belle didn't know what to make of me. She was used to people who stuck around, who fought for things no matter how impossible. And I knew that, in her world, my life might look like I'd simply given up. But I hadn't. I'd made choices—choices to walk away from a life that had chewed me up and spit me out. Reef Harbor had been my salvation, and I wasn't about to leave it behind, not even for her, not even because I loved her.

"She's got so much left to do, you know?" I said quietly. "I want her to do it. Hell, I'll support her from here. I'll donate to her cause and fund whatever new project she's got up her sleeve. But I'm not about to drag her into my version of paradise and tell her it's enough. It wouldn't be fair."

Cato and Franco exchanged a look, but RiRi softened, sighing as she reached over and patted my shoulder. "You're making it harder than it needs to be, Mick. But if you think it's best…"

"Sometimes the right thing isn't the easiest thing," Ireplied, shrugging, though my heart didn't feel half as casual as I sounded.

They all stared at me, each of them with their brand of pity mixed with frustration, and I couldn't tell whether they were about to hug me or drown me in a margarita. But I knew one thing: I wasn't backing down. I'd make sure Belle knew she could go after every dream she had, whether I was in the picture or not.

And that's when I saw her stepping out of the bar's shadow and looking right at me, shock and hurt flickering in her eyes. She must have overheard our conversation; actually, I was pretty damned sure she had. I could only hope she'd understand why I was choosing to let her go—even if it was breaking me in the process.

Belle looked as wounded as I felt. And if I was being honest, that's the last thing I wanted to do. But then again, I had a knack for ruining the things I loved by overthinking them. She stepped forward, her sandals quiet against the creaky wooden floor of my hut. Cato, Franco, and RiRi were smart enough to scatter.

"Mick," Belle's voice was low, edged with something raw and jagged. "Is that really how you feel?"

I swallowed, glancing around like I might find the right words lying somewhere in the cluttered corners of my place. "Belle," I started, my voice rough. "I didn't think you'd…hear all that."

Her arms wrapped tightly around her middle, her mouth a hard line. "You didn't think I'd hear, or you didn't want me to hear?"

I took a breath, bracing myself. "I didn't want you to hear."

She shook her head, a bitter smile flickering on her lips. "So you just made this decision for me? Decided to play the noble martyr?"

"It's not like that," I said, but even to my ears, it sounded weak. "I was trying to think about what's best for you."

Her eyes flashed. "What's best for me? Mick, I am perfectly capable of deciding what's best for myself."

A laugh slipped out before I could stop it, bitter and unplanned. "Are you, though? Because every time I look at you, Belle, you're exhausted. You're pushing yourself to the edge every damn day. Do you think I don't see that? I know what that path looks like. I know where it leads."

She took a step closer, challenging me. "And what if I want that life? What if I like the edge? That doesn't mean you get to make this choice for me."

"Maybe it's just not a choice you'd make if you were seeing things clearly," I countered, my voice coming out sharper than I meant. "You work like you're chasing something you'll never catch. And I'm not—I'm not going to sit here and be a consolation prize for you. I'm not gonna be the thing you settle for when the work gets too hard."

She flinched, and instantly, I hated myself. But I couldn't take the words back now.

"So that's what you think I'd do? That I'd settle for you because I fail at work?" Her voice cracked, but her eyes were fierce, holding me in place. "Do you think that little of me?"

"No," I said quickly, stepping forward, trying to close the distance. "No, Belle, that's not it. I think the world of you. I think you're incredible. I just…I want you to be happy, Belle. And I don't think I can make you happy—not the way you need."

She looked at me for a long moment, like she was trying to peel back my layers and see what was hiding underneath. "You're so scared of being left behind," she whispered, "that you're running away before I can even try to stay."

I opened my mouth to deny it, but the words wouldn't come. She wasn't wrong. I was terrified. Terrified thatsomeday she'd look at me in Reef Harbor, content with my simple life, and wonder why she ever thought she could be happy with a guy like me.

Belle took another step closer, close enough that I could feel the heat radiating off her skin and smell that faint trace of salt and coconut from her hair.

"You don't get to make this choice for me, Mick. You don't get to assume that I'd be miserable just because you were once."

I looked down, letting out a shaky breath. "I don't want you to wake up one day, trapped here, hating me for it."

"And you think I'd hate you less for pushing me away now?" Her voice was barely a whisper now, but it cut through me like a blade.

I didn't know how to respond because I knew she was right. I could feel it in my gut, twisting there, reminding me that I was standing on the edge of losing her, all because I couldn't shake the fear that I'd somehow hold her back.

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