Page 104 of Wolf

“What’s up?” I ask as he rubs his eyes. He looks as tired as I do these days.

I know it’s hard being the one who makes all the decisions because, in the end, he bears the brunt of those outcomes. We’ve lost some good men, and it weighs on the big broody fucker. I’d try to ease the burden with useless words, but it would just annoy him.

Don’t matter what I say, Joker will always accept his punishment and that’s to live with this shit until the day he dies.

Joker leans back in his chair, the pitiful thing squealing under his weight, and says, “I knew the day would come that Ice would take a stand. The fucker’s been running scared since but this…”

He waves his hand, and I nod. I haven’t told him what Rose said because this is between me and the sheriff. I don’t want this to come down on the MC. However, with my silence, it leaves Joker believing that Rose was taken over a twenty-five-year-old feud about business and territory.

“It’s only a matter of time,” I say, and Joker raises his head. “The fucker can’t hide forever.”

Chapter 31

Lilli

The next day, once we’re out of the house, I grab Rachel’s arm and force her to stop. She glances away, working her jaw and I hiss, “Where were you last night?”

”Nowhere,” she says, and I shake my head.

“Rae, do you want to end up like me? Or Mir?” I ask and she stiffens before spinning away.

Facing her back, I watch her shoulders heave before she says, “Miriam found love. She’s happy. She’s free. I don’t know what you’re doing, but I’m not going to waste my life in that house when I can be free. I’m taking my chances because I’d rather die than be chained here.”

…Like you.

She doesn’t have to say it, I hear it in her brittle tone, and dropping the subject, I brush her shoulder as I pass and head toward the school.

Her words hit home though. I understand her need because it’s mine too, but I’m not giving in, I’m just waiting it out. Right?

My steps slow and Rachel catches up to me. She slides her arm through mine and says quietly, “I’m sorry.”

Pulling away, I say, “Don’t be.”

The remainder of the week flies by. Since I have to pee every two seconds, I know Rachel was gone three times this week. Where does she go and with whom?

I hope it's some harmless teenage boy but without asking, I’ll never know. Still, I’m upset by her cruel insinuations and haven’t said much to her beyond the obligatory conversation required in front of our parents.

It’s Friday, midnight and I’m sitting on the floor beside my bed, staring at the phone. Apparently, Miriam and Duke are getting married.

I know it’s a risk and I shouldn’t ask but I would really like my sister to be there. It’s at the clubhouse though. Since I don’t know what happened and you won’t tell me, I have no idea if I’m asking too much…I planned it during Mama and Daddy’s scripture time. If you can get away, I’ll send someone to pick you up….

It’s a risk for too many reasons to count. If Mama and Daddy catch wind of this, I’m toast. I’ll have to face Wolf and his distaste which brings me no pleasure, but I have to make a decision.

I can’t stay here forever. I have a new life to consider and no matter what I do, it’s not going to thrive under the Abernathy roof.

At a minimum, I can try to see if Wolf will talk to me. It’s only fair that he knows the truth. If that doesn’t pan out, well, I have a thousand dollars to start.

On Friday evening, I leave Rachel at the “library” and rush home. It’s not ideal but I can’t leave Mercy alone, so I lead her through the park with a weird thrill of both excitement and fear.

Mercy was wary of walking through the woods, no surprise, but when I assured her that we were meeting someone who would be taking us to see Miriam, she readily agreed.

Now as we approach the curb where I first met Duke and Darcy used to pick me up, a swirl of emotions rushes through me. Anticipation. Sadness. Fear.

So much has happened since that long ago night and yet, in some ways, I’m still stuck right where it all began.

I’m not surprised, but I am disappointed when I see Maddox idling at the curb. His smile doesn’t reach his eyes as I usher Mercy into the back seat before sitting beside him. Disapproval rolls off him in waves, and I can’t tell if it's because of what I did with Wolf or bringing Mercy. Either way, I can’t change it now, so I ignore him.

Mercy is practically brimming with excitement, and I smile when we arrive, and she jumps from the vehicle. I’m hoping this isn’t going to be an X-rated party and for the first time I’m uneasy about bringing her, but I’m pleasantly surprised when we enter the picnic area to find it transformed into a proper wedding venue.

---