Page 7 of Diem

Perhaps Diem's take-no-shit personality is to blame. When we were younger, and I would bemoan my state as enemy number one, he would encourage me to fight back or at least let it go, because what they thought didn't matter. Except apparently, it does, because he’s one of them now.

Ugh.

Avoiding Harriet’s expectant stare, I turn my head and meet Diem’s gaze. Immediately, my cheeks heat and I’m caught in his beautiful peepers while he looks at me with furrowed brows. What's he thinking now?

Despite his enmity, his undivided attention reminds me of that night. He was so careful but also impatient as though he couldn’t wait to feel me. Regardless, I orgasmed multiple times, which must be why I feel the familiar heat build in my core.

His personality may be shit but his sexual prowess, unmeasured. His eyes narrow when I shift in my seat and then his lip curls in a smirk and he raises a brow. Need unfurls in my veins, and I catch my breath, as he leans into Landon sitting beside him.

Dismissed, I study the side of his face while he says something I’m too far away to hear and slaps Landon on the back. Does he miss his brothers? It’s hard to tell since he’s filled in the void easily enough.

“Maeve?”

Shaking my head, I turn back to Harriet, ignoring the painful need still hovering on my skin. Maybe it really is time for the new me. I just wish I knew who that was.

Either way, it doesn’t include pining after Diem McCafferty. This I know without a doubt.

“Yes,” I say, and Harriet’s brows fly up.

“Really?”

“What? Yes.”

I shrug and she smiles as Matt looks up with a frown. Thankfully, our conversation turns to other things but through the remainder of lunch, I brood and when the bell rings, I huff out a sigh.

What if the specter of Diem and that night never truly goes away? Then, I’m fucked…that’s what.

Chapter Two

Maeve

During the last period of the day, the principal announces an upcoming assembly to discuss Dixie’s death. His words create an ache in my sternum, and I sink in my seat, bowing my head. It’s probably stupid, but I’ve managed to convince myself that Dixie is just away and soon, she’ll be coming back with her wide smile and sassy attitude.

Reminders like this push me to a place that I try hard not to go to and pulling myself out is that much more difficult when I do. Dixie was the only person who knew about my foibles and therefore the only who could talk me out of them. Without her here, I fear I may get lost. Some days, I already feel like I’m there, standing at the corner of my life with no idea which direction to turn.

After school, I trudge through the parking lot, pausing when Matt calls my name. Wiping my eyes, I turn with a fake smile as he approaches.

Of course, I can’t hide my sorrow from him. His brows furrow and he touches my arm. “What is it?”

Sniffling, I look away and meet Diem’s gaze across the lot. What does he want now?

With a shake of my head, I say, “It’s just Dixie…I miss her, you know?”

“I’m so sorry, Mae,” he says, and I don’t protest when he wraps me up in a hug.

Matt is all lean lines and bones. Truthfully, it’s like hugging a tree but I’m grateful for the kindness, nonetheless.

Except, I can feel Diem’s eyes boring a hole in my skull, something else I don’t understand. If he hates me so damn much, why is he always there…watching?

Whatever.

Pulling back from Matt, I say quietly, “Thanks, I needed that.”

His eyes brighten and he licks his lips before saying, “Do you want to hang out? You can come over, or I can?”

Truthfully, I just want to be alone, but maybe having Matt around will dull the ache that flares up from time to time. I miss my friend and I should be spending as much time as I can with those who are still around because clearly, you never know when it’s going to be too late.

“Okay,” I say. “You wanna come to my house?”

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