Page 68 of Martyr

Yejun snorted. “You believe that?”

“I believe he doesn’t like you and he wanted to try and get me to see you guys are assholes,” Nix said. “Using scare tactics was a lame approach, but he’s hardly dangerous.”

“According to Lake, you were pretty shaken up after what happened at the stables.”

“That wasn’t Grady.”

“Either there are multiple people messing with you, or your friend is lying. I don’t think I have to tell you which option is the most likely?”

“I trust him.” Nix didn’t really have much of a reason to, considering they hadn’t known each other all that long, but… “He’s always been upfront with me. I’ve known from the beginning he doesn’t like you.”

“And Juri?”

“He didn’t have any involvement.”

“Men keep flocking to you, Firebird,” he stated. “I’m not a fan. I also don’t trust any of them, especially not Juri. The Ferd family have been prominent figures in the Club for generations, and yet he and his brother chose to give that all up. Now, after fighting for his right to leave, he’s suddenly willing to come crawling back for a guy he barely knows?” Yejun clicked his tongue. “Not buying it.”

“What do you think he’s doing then?” Nix asked, because at this point, it was best to hear him out.

Yejun was the type of person who lingered on their emotions. He’d cling to the feeling, good or bad, and drown himself in it. That was part of what made him so dangerous. He could become hostile in a flash, but it would take longer for that fiery anger to burn away. Talking things out seemed to help him work through things quicker,

“I don’t agree,” Nix said. “But let’s pretend for a moment you’re right.”

Yejun came to a sudden stop and turned to set a steely look his way.

Before he could threaten him, Nix continued. “What’s it matter? I don’t want him back.”

“You don’t want us either.”

“I…” A vision of Yejun cleaning him up after that time in the art room, followed quickly by West cuddling him almostsweetly, and how Lake had draped an arm around his shoulders while they watched a movie the other day…All of that entered his mind and Nix was forced to acknowledge the truth he’d really rather keep hidden. “I don’t…not want you.”

It was clear Yejun hadn’t been expecting that. “Is this a confession?”

“I hate you all,” Nix stated, “but I also, maybe, like you all as well. If we’d met under different circumstances, if I wasn’t forced into your beds, maybe this could have been something real between us. Maybe I could even get behind dating three people instead of one. But that’s not how it happened. I wasn’t given a choice here, June. I have my pride, same as you do. I still need time, but I’m trying to accept this is my life now. Which means accepting that even when you three piss me off, you’re still who I’ll be going home to.”

“That your fancy way of saying you don’t intend to cheat?”

“I’m smarter than that.”

“True.” Yejun blew out a breath and shoved his hands into the front pockets of his black jeans. “If Juri makes a move on you—”

“I’ll tell him to back off.”

He tipped his head. “And if you change your mind? Seems like you can fall for someone fairly easily.”

“Don’t use my feelings for you against me. That isn’t fair. Besides, Juri wouldn’t resort to coercion the same way you three do.”

“You don’t know him that well, Firebird.”

“Fair, but I do know most people don’t start relationships this way. Out of everyone, you also have the least right to be this jealous. You’re the one fucking other people, remember? I’m sticking to the rules.”

“You said that didn’t bother you,” Yejun reminded.

“It doesn’t.” Not right now, in any case. Nix could see it becoming an issue for him down the line, but that was a problem for a future version of himself. At the moment, knowing there were other outlets for the Demon acted as a small comfort. “I’ve come more in the past month than I have my entire life. Please, keep sleeping around.”

“If anyone else said that, it would be sarcastic and bitter.” Yejun took a single step closer, his shoulders squared, expression tight as though Nix had told him something upsetting. “But you mean it, don’t you.”

He swallowed the sudden lump in his throat and retreated a step, covering it up by twisting on his heels and continuing the walk to the Roost. “This shouldn’t bother you. I’m saying it’s cool that you sleep around. You don’t have to worry about me getting in the way or complaining like some crossed lover.”