Page 163 of Splintered Hearts

I hadn’t officially told her we were dating, but I know sheknew. “He’s...” Gone. Gone and it’s all my fault. “Busy.” I try not to look at Hunter and Mark as the lie slips.

“Lia,” Hunter says softly. “Do you want me to give the sauce a stir?”

“Oh! I got it. You boys sit. Do you want anything? A drink?”

“No, I’m alright, Mom.”

“Okay well, make yourself comfortable.” She squeezes my arm. “I missed you so much.” I’ve always been here, and we still visit at my house occasionally, but this is different, though. She heads for the kitchen, leaving me with eight sets of eyes on me. “Well, this isn’t unsettling, one bit.”

Mark’s jaw clenches before he turns away, following Lia. While I have apologies for everyone I need a place to start. I look at Bri, who just looks more hurt than anything. “Can we talk?”

“No,” Xavi snaps.

“Oh my god.” She pushes him out of the way. “Give it a rest.” She’s gotten her hair done since I saw her last. Now her braids are dark blue at the ends and threaded with gold, piled high on her head in pigtail buns making her cute bear makeup look even cuter. “Come on.” She drags me upstairs and down the hall, and my feet nearly dig into the carpet when I realize where she’s taking me. “If you want to talk to me you’ll do it in here.”

She practically shoves me through the door and I freeze. Something breaks inside me. This is not what I was expecting. “It’s still her room,” she says softly.

It isn’t, though. It’s a fucking shrine.

“Lia didn’t want to keep it the same way. Instead, she wanted a place she could come to remember her.” Her room looks almost the same, but it’s different. Her bed is still in here, her desk and the chair she sat in and drew. The bean-bag chair is still in the corner, but instead of her things everywhere there are pictures. Pictures of her, pictures of them. Pictures she painted and awards and medals she’d won. Luci was an artist at her coreand super smart. Science was her favorite, and her creativity plus super brain helped her win nearly all of the science fairs.

“Go help your mother,” Bri says to Xavi.

“Bri—”

“Go.” She stares at him until he concedes. Xavier listens to her like the obedient sucker he is for her. “That boy.” Except he isn’t a boy anymore. He’s not some thirteen-year-old kid with a crush. He’s a man now at twenty-three, with deep feelings for a girl that will never have any for him.

“Is that true? What you said to Noah. That you were getting back at him and broke up with him?”

This takes me by surprise. “I fucked up.”

“Why do you keep hurting the people around you to save face? Got to be honest, it’s not even that great.” My mouth tugs slightly. “I keep waiting for you to grow up and stop acting like an asshole. What you did to Noah was—”

“So fucked up. I know.” Admitting that, I swallow. “I love him. More than anything. I thought I was saving him.”

She shakes her head and sits on Luci’s bed. I wonder how often she still comes up here. Grabbing a pillow, she pulls it against her body. “I think that’s the worst part.”

“What?”

“Nothing smells like her anymore. Her pillows don’t smell like her hair, the clothes don’t smell like her body wash. Nothing smells like her. I knew she was gone, but the day I couldn’t smell her in here anymore... That was the moment it really hit me.”

This makes me brighten now with determination. “I want to say I’m sorry, for acting like—”

“A dick?”

“I mean—”

“A hippo’s bussy—”

“Okay, I—”

“A skunk’s nut sack?”

“Okay, enough.” She giggles and I can’t help but laugh. “I am sorry. I’ve been awful but—”

“No buts in apologies,” she warns.

She’s right. “I am sorry I’ve been awful and selfish. We all went through this terrible thing and instead of putting in the work I shut everyone out. I just shut down. That wasn’t right, and I can’t change how I treated you all. I just want to do better. For everyone. I want to change. I want to, I want to—”

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