Page 121 of Splintered Hearts

“Which his mother asked me to do,” I correct Hunter.

“You’d have done it anyway, and we both know that.”

“I bet you both have shows you watch together,” Mark adds.

“Books you both read, because I found it real odd that Jamie had a book on his nightstand with a bookmark in it and got real flustered when I asked about it.”

“He reads with you, babe. That’s like, your nerdy kryptonite.”

“We’re friends. We have a friendship, and if you don’t shut your mouth right now he’ll be my new best friend,” I snap.

“They totally are boyfriends.” Hunter grins.

“Jamie doesn’t want a relationship, and it’s fine. We do all the normal things couples do.”

Mark’s humor dies on his face. “But you aren’t.”

Chewing my bottom lip, I just want the pain to stop. “Doesit matter? He’s just hanging out with me.” Why can’t that be enough? I hate this. “It doesn’t matter if we don’t have a title.” It’s not like Jamie is simply going to go out and hook up with other people.

That... that sounds more like settling though. I’m just there. Maybe Jamie doesn’t really want me—I’m just convenient.

I’m going to cry.

Mark sets his cards down, moving his chair closer to me and grabbing my hands gently. “If you’re happy, then fine. I want you to be happy. If you’re not, though, I want you to listen to me. Do not settle for less than you deserve. Stop settling to make other people happy.”

I pull my hands from his, gathering the cards. The game is over. I have to go home. This is too much. I came here to forget about this, not pick at it. “I’m happy.” I clear my throat. “What we have works.” Does it? Am I really happy? The tears currently welling in my eyes say no.

I focus on cleaning up but feel eyes on me. Hunter stares at me. “What?”

“Questioning my life choices, Noah. That’s all.”

“What? Why?”

He stands up, and I nearly jump back from the swinging pendulum between his legs. I never knew there was such a thing as too much cock. Hunter shakes his head, snatching his boxers from the floor, thankfully caging that beast. “We just had that entire heart-to-heart with our dicks out.”

Twenty Nine

Jamie

Waiting for Noah to get home, I don’t know what to do. This morning I finished his shelf and Hunter agreed to move it for me this weekend. I’m happy Noah likes it but my mind keeps going back to that hug. He held onto me like he may float away.

Honestly, I didn’t think this would go anywhere. I thought maybe Noah and I would fuck around and then he’d go off to bigger and better things, but with each day we spend together it’s getting harder and harder to ignore my feelings. I don’t do shit like this. Good things like this just don’t happen to me.

And Noah, he’s slowly becoming the best thing.

All I want is for him to come home so I can talk to him about it. Noah isn’t a relationship person, but maybe if I talk to him we could think about it. While I wait I clean every possible surface in this house just to keep my mind busy.

My mind drifts now to yesterday. Us on the couch. The comfortable silence as both of us worked on our own things. Together. The way he touched me, the way I kissed him. The way we just fit. It was simply perfect. Comfort and peace rolled into one security blanket for the two of us.

Grabbing my chest, I squeeze the fabric of my shirt. What the hell am I going to do? It was easy to lie to myself at first, but it’s now getting harder to ignore the mounting feelings I have for him. What would it even look like? Noah isn’t the relationship type and I... well...

I’m broken beyond repair

Noah comes through the door in a fury.

“Hey.” I’m startled a bit when he drops down into my lap, mashing our lips together. It takes me a moment to process what’s actually happening before I melt into the roughness of his touch.

Okay. Damn.