Page 46 of Choosing the right Man

When Mason stands and walks to the stage, I can’t help but wonder what it would be like to be his — to truly be his without anything holding us back — to have every person in the room know he came in with me, not as a business associate, but as his girlfriend.

Audrey breaks away from the gentleman she was speaking to and smiles at me.

“Damn, Chloe, he truly is a fine man,” she whispers.

We stare as he walks, his stride purposeful, his composure unshakeable.

“Yeah, he really is,” I say. “But it doesn’t mean anything.” I’m still feeling dejected after he became so cold in the back of his car.

“It means something, that’s for sure. It’s clear you’re having a rough time. You have to quit tearing yourself apart. You have to figure this out,” she tells me.

“Nothing should happen between us, but something will whether I like it or not,” I say.

She puts her hand over the top of mine, sympathy in her eyes. “Just remember you’re human, and whether you like it or not, there will be times you’ll mess up in life. It doesn’t define you, nor does it erase everything that’s wonderful about you. It’s a privilege to know you, to be loved by you.”

I fight back emotion at the power of her words. “I’m so glad to have you in my life.”

“And I’m glad to have you,” she assures me. She squeezes my hand again.

People surround Mason; he’s the last speaker for the night. Our dinner has come to its conclusion. There’s no more need to stay around. I don’t want an awkward ride home with him. I’d rather take an Uber.

“Are you ready to leave?” Audrey asks, obviously seeing distress in my face.

“Yeah, I really am.”

“Good, let’s go back to my place so there’s no chance of interruptions. You barely touched your dinner. We’ll order pizza, drink more wine, and watch a chick flick. There’s no reason to talk about things you don’t want to talk about.”

I smile at her, incredibly grateful. “That sounds like exactly what I need.” I don’t try to push my way through the throng of people vying for Mason’s attention. Audrey and I collect our wraps and purses and walk from the building. We aren’t the first people to leave, though the party’s still going strong. I relax as soon as I leave the building. I’m not going to attend work events like this anymore, not when I don’t know what’s happening with my life.

I thought I’d decided when it comes to Mason. I was wrong. A cold affair isn’t something I can enter into lightly. Even if my relationship seems like it’s over, I can’t just have sex with someone. There has to be feelings there. I realize I do have feelings for Mason. I’m also realizing, though, that he doesn’t have them for me. I’d be incredibly foolish to fall for him even a little bit, much less fall in love with him. What in the hell am I going to do?

Chapter Thirty

Chloe

My phone is off while I stay with Audrey on Sunday. I’m leery of going to work on Monday, but I push the thought aside. I like my job, and I don’t want to let my personal life ruin that.

I borrow a suit from Audrey for work Monday morning, making me feel like a million bucks. There’s a reason people spend so much money on clothes. I’ve heard the saying that clothes make the person but never realized how true that was until slipping into a thousand-dollar suit. I’ll feel horrible if something happens to it, but Audrey waves her hand as if I’m foolish. She assures me they’re just clothes and clothes are replaceable.

My morning flies by without a problem, without a sign of Mason. But as lunchtime nears, he approaches me. I see an unreadable expression on his face.

“Come eat with me,” he says. Two women I work next to gather their belongings and head downstairs to the deli. I’m supposed to go with them, but they smile and say goodbye without looking back. If the boss wants to change your lunch plans, there’s no arguing.

I’m not thrilled, but I obediently stand and follow him to his office. If he wants lunch, I’d much rather it happen in public. But there are too many people in the offices, and I don’t want to have a tantrum and make a scene. If I want employees talking about us, making a scene is a good way to accomplish it.

We arrive in his office without speaking a word. He closes the door, and I see that food has already been delivered. He was sure I’d come back with him. Of course he was. People don’t deny him what he wants.

“Look, Mason...” The silence feels like a weight dragging me beneath icy water. “We made a mistake, thinking we could jump into an affair. It’s not who I am. I don’t think it’s who you are, either. You’re a respected businessman in this community, and you need to be more discreet in your personal affairs. I think we should admit this isn’t working. Yes, there’s sexual tension, and yes, it’s obvious I want you, but we can both agree to get over it and have nothing more than a working relationship from here on out.”

I’m proud of how calm I sound as I give my rehearsed speech. It’s clear and precise, and there’s no wavering in my tone. He listens as if he hears me. There’s a flare in his eyes, but other than that, he doesn’t give a reaction.

“I’m sorry about Saturday night. I... I was caught unaware in the car. I don’t do relationships. I don’t develop feelings. But you’re sliding past my defenses and I... I don’t know how to handle it, so I shut down. I know I hurt you.”

An apology seems foreign from his lips. I know it isn’t something he normally does. My defenses are instantly shattered at the vulnerability in his voice. I want to protect him, want to help him.

“You’re a man who knows what he wants. You like sex without commitment. There’s nothing wrong with that if your partner feels the same. I thought I could be that way, thought Icould do that since my boyfriend doesn’t want me. But I can’t have sex with someone and have them treat me like a whore. Even if that’s what I’m being.” The last words are spoken barely above a whisper.

He moves quickly, approaching me and tugging me against him. There’s fire in his eyes.

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