Page 10 of Audacity

‘Is it helpful if I run through how our process works?’ she asks.

‘Please,’ I say, because this “process” has been shrouded in mystery from the moment Anton set up this meeting, and I find myself totally out of my depth. All I know is that I’ve already paid six figures to get myself on Seraph’s books and that if Athena or one of her colleagues agrees to work for me I will find myself in some kind of professional and sexual nirvana with nary a headache again.

‘Of course. In a moment, I’ll leave you to peruse Athena’s files online.’ She nods to the end of the room, where there’s a white leather swivel chair and a desk with a large iMac. ‘These will include her CV, which I can of course email to you, as well as anonymous references from her previous Seraph clients and a series of photographs of her, including some of an intimate nature.’

The heat rises to my neck at the mere thought of it.

Holy fuck.

‘It’s our policy not to share any photographs of our candidates digitally, to ensure their complete protection, but you should take as much time as you like in here, and there are tissues’—she nods delicately towards the desk—‘should you need them. I’ve also taken the liberty of pulling two other candidates’ files should you not feel as though Athena is the right fit for you or your business at this stage, and you’re welcome to access those, too, from the home screen.’

‘Thank you,’ I say weakly.

‘Should you wish to proceed,’ she continues, ‘we have a strictly prescribed hiring process. At the first stage, you would invite the candidate to your offices, where you can conduct your interview according to your hiring policies. At this point, you are also welcome to have her sit down with other members of your team.

‘Of course, this stage is not just a chance to find you the perfect executive assistant but a preliminary opportunity for you to assess the extent of your sexual attraction to the candidate in the flesh. We would ask, though, that all your questions at this point pertain only to her ability to execute her role as executive assistant.’

I nod my understanding.Got it.

‘You’ll understand, Mr Sullivan, that everything we do is geared towards the safety and wellbeing of our candidates. Therefore, whomever you’ve met with is welcome to walk away at this stage, or indeed any stage.

‘If, however, you’re both happy to proceed, then the next round of the hiring process is a dinner where you can both discuss the more intimate parts of your proposed contract. Frank communication between the two of you is strongly encouraged at this point to set expectations and establish boundaries. The candidate will be interviewing you just as much as you are interviewing her, and it’s my experience that she is far more likely to walk away from this stage than you are.’

‘Yeah.’ I clear my throat. ‘Yes. That’s fine, of course.’

‘Good. We usually hold these dinners in a private spot in a selection of trusted hotels, and we reserve a suite in the same hotel for your use. Directly after supper, if you’re both happy to proceed based on your conversation, you and she can make use of the suite to explore the sexual side of the interview.’

I begin to gape and quickly clamp my jaw shut. Anton mentioned something about this in passing, but still. It’s all so…transactional. I mean, of course it is. But the idea of sitting across from a woman at dinner when I haven’t been on a proper date in donkey’s years and spelling out for her all the things I want to do to her before taking her upstairs for a fucking test drive is confronting. It really is.

It’s also, for some reason, incredibly arousing.

I have to force myself to ask the next question.

‘Is there a prescribed format for that part, too?’

A tiny smile. ‘No. That’s down to you. We ask that she establish a safeword and that you honour it.’

‘Okay.’

‘You’ve already paid your retainer, for which I thank you. You may see and interview as many candidates as you like, but for every candidate you take to the second round, there is a twenty-five thousand pound fee that goes straight to her. This is to ensure that none of our clients take gratuitous liberties with our candidates.’

It makes sense, and I like that they have this measure in place. Ugh. I imagine some dirty bastards would work their way through every woman on Seraph’s books otherwise.

‘That sounds reasonable,’ I say.

‘Excellent.’ She pushes her chair back. ‘Now, unless you have any other questions, I’ll pull up Athena’s details for you and leave you to it.’

CHAPTER 4

Gabe

Viewing Athena’s files is akin to being a lobster in a gently simmering vat of water. At least, that’s what I conclude as I look at the Contents page at the start of the document. My journey of discovery will take me, apparently, from her CV and professional references through to something called Intimate References, which simultaneously has my skin crawling and my blood heating. I’m sure it’ll fluff me up nicely before I look at the Images section.

As I read through her opening statement and the rest of her CV, it quickly becomes apparent to me that this woman is not only disgustingly accomplished but grotesquely overqualified to assist anyone.

She went to school in a number of European countries—the daughter of two cultural attachés, apparently—and speaks French, German and Italian fluently. After that, she finished up her secondary education one year early at the unimpeachable Cheltenham Ladies’ College and read Classics at Balliol, Oxford.

After only two years at Bain instead of the requisite three years for MBA entry, the Sorbonne accepted her for their MBA programme from which, reading between the lines of her employment history, she was plucked by Seraph.

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