Page 84 of Captivating

“I’m going with her,” I tell anyone who comes near her until Xander pulls me away from Lilah.

“You’ve got to let them help her. I’ll get you there right behind her. But you gotta let them help her first.” He has to physically hold me back as the two men and one woman in uniform go to work, and a cop walks toward me.

“Can you tell me what just happened?” the officer in blue asks.

“I don’t have a fucking clue.” I refuse to take my eyes off Lilah, and when I swear I hear my name on her lips, I shove my way through everyone to get to her. I take her hand in mine and wince. Her hand is fucking freezing. “She’s freezing,” I yell at whoever the hell will listen.

“It’s the blood loss.” A different officer moves next to me. “Has anyone checked you out yet, son?”

They cut my hoodie off her body and have a pile of white gauze, which is now bright fucking red, pressed against her abdomen.

“I’m fine.” I try to ignore him and move with the medics as they get ready to take her from me. “Just fix her.”

I refuse to let go.

“Son, you’ve got to let them go.” He looks around, blocking me. “Do we have anyone who can take a look at him?”

“I’m not staying here.” I shove my way past him and grab Xander, staring at my hands that are soaked with Lilah’s blood, gripping Xander’s gray shirt. Fuck. “I need to get to the hospital.”

He turns to the cops and tells them something, but I don’t hear it.

I don’t hear anything over the roaring in my ears.

Once we’re in the car, the world starts coming back into focus.

“What—what the fuck just happened?” I ask, unsure if I’m asking Xander or myself. “Was that the publicist?”

“Zoe,” Xander agrees and hits CarPlay. “Call Noah Ryan.”

The phone rings before Noah answers, and I don’t give Xander a chance to talk. “Get to the hospital, Noah. It’s bad, man. I tried to stop it, but I was too late.”

I run my hands over my face and look at them again.

They’re wet.

I’m wet.

Fuck. I’m crying. I didn’t even realize I was crying.

Noah asks a million questions all at once, none of them registering with me.

“Call your parents. Tell them the publicist shot Lilah. Tell them I’m sorry. I tried to stop it, but I was too late. They’re taking her to the hospital now?—”

“What hospital?” he screams, and the sound is something, like you’d hear from a broken fucking animal, being ripped from his throat.

Shit. I didn’t even think to ask.

“They’re taking her to UPenn. They have a better trauma center than Kroydon Hills,” Xander tells him. “Call your parents, Noah. Then call Killian’s. I’ll call if we hear anything before you get there.”

“Where’s Zoe?” Noah asks, his voice at an unnatural decibel.

“Dead,” Xander answers, and I turn to look at him.

“How?” I’m not sure if I’m asking how it happened or how I missed it.

“I killed her.”

“Please let a doctor look at your shoulder,” my mother pleads for the millionth time in the past four hours, like I’m going to give her a different answer now than I did then.

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