Page 20 of Captivating

I don’t fear being alone. I fear being in a room surrounded by people I don’t trust.

—Lilah’s Secret Thoughts

Imade sure I was out of the house this morning before Noah woke up, not wanting to test my loyalty and love for my brother. Because I swear to everything I love, I may have killed him if I had to see him before I had caffeine, and then I’d have had to deal with my mother. Instead, I snuck out like a child. Not gonna lie either, it made me happier than I’ve been since I got home. And when my best friend opens her front door, her baby girl, Lennox, on her hip and a look of exhaustion on her face, I know it was worth it.

“Lilah— What are you doing here? Oh my goodness, did we have plans?” Addie pushes the door open and steps aside for me to walk in, and as I do, she tracks the goodies I picked up fromSweet Temptations on my way over here. “If that’s coffee, I may just leave your cousin for you.”

“You are pretty hot,” I giggle and triumphantly hold up the cup carrier. “Coffee for you, tea for me, and chocolate chip muffins for both of us because I may need to eat my feelings this morning.”

“That’s it. Screw Leo. I’m yours.”

I scoop Lennox out of her arms and inhale her sweet baby scent as she smacks my cheeks and opens her mouth for a sloppy, wet kiss. “Hey, baby girl. Did you miss me?”

“Not as much as her momma did.” Addie lifts the first lid, sees that it’s tea and frowns as she hands it to me before she happily picks up her own cup. “How are you holding up?”

I bounce back and forth until I’ve got Lennox giggling, then look over at her momma. “Ask me again in a few hours after we meet with the label.”

“That’s today?” She sits down at the kitchen table, sets out two napkins, and places a muffin on each one. “Is that in town or in New York?”

“In town. They have studio space in New York, but their main offices are still on the outskirts of Kroydon Hills. It’s why they noticed me in the first place. Local girl making way too much noise to ignore.” They had no chance. I was determined to make them notice. Refused to accept anything less. And once they did, I had them. I was the fifth act that signed to their label, and now it’s one of the biggest labels in the world.

They helped me, and I helped them.

We’ve grown together.

But if we can’t come to an agreement, there’s no way I’ll be signing a new contract when mine runs out.

I break off a piece of muffin, and Lennox opens her mouth. “Umm... can baby girl have muffin?”

“She shouldn’t have sugar yet, but Leo doesn’t listen, so you might as well give up the goods. He spoils her.” She talks about my cousin with such adoration in her voice that my heart feels full. They haven’t had the easiest road, but after the hell they went through last month, everything seems to have calmed down, and even exhausted, she looks genuinely happy.

“Where is my cousin?” I ask as I place the tiniest piece of muffin in Lennox’s mouth, laughing as she gums it with a toothless grin.

“Away game,” is all the answer she needs to give. Leo and his brothers, Hendrix and Nixon, are all professional hockey players. My family is full of athletes. Football players, hockey players, dancers... and then there’s me. The dreamer. That’s what they always called me. Everyone else in the family played some kind of sport at some point in their lives, but not me. Give me a piano and a notebook. I never needed a ball or a puck or a pair of pointe shoes. Just words and music.

“Okay, lay it on me. You didn’t stop by at eight a.m. just to surprise me with coffee. Although I will love you forever for it. I swear, Lennox goes on sleep strike when Leo is gone, and Izzy was a bear to get up and dressed for school this morning. I haven’t known you that long, Lilah, but I know you well enough to know something is eating at you.”

Addie’s hair is up in a messy bun, and her sweats look a day or two old, but somehow my friend still looks beautiful. Natural. Comfortable in her own skin. I’m not sure I remember what it’s like to be comfortable in my skin. “I’ve known you long enough to consider you one of my best friends, Adelaide. And I don’t have a whole lot of people I trust or let in.”

“Don’t make me cry, Lilah. It’s too early for tears.” She reaches out and takes my hand. “I’m so lucky to have met you. Definitely a perk of marrying Leo.”

“Ha. I’m a perk. I’m so holding that over his head,” I tease and give Lennox more muffin when she nips at my fingers. Pretty sure that was her way of saying,hey lady, don’t forget about me.“I don’t know, I just wanted to see you and this little girl. I wanted to talk to someone for a few minutes who wasn’t going to tell me how to live my life.”

“Good lord. If you could please figure out how I should live mine and let me know, I’d love you forever. I’d never dare to tell you how to live yours when I can’t figure out my own. Anything I can do to help?”

I snuggle Lennox a little tighter and relax the way I swear Killian did when he held me last night. “Nope. Not unless you tell me how to deal with overbearing, overprotective men.”

“Sex,” she deadpans. “After an orgasm or two, I forget about how overbearing and overprotective Leo is. Well, I forget it annoys me and let it turn me on instead. Add possessive, and you’ve got yourself hot sex.”

“Eww,” I gag. “My cousin used to eat bugs. And one of the overbearing men is my brother.”

Addie looks over the lid of her pink paper coffee cup at me, not convinced. “One of them may be, but you love Noah. He’s not what’s bothering you. There’s another man bothering you. You wouldn’t come here to bitch about Noah.”

I sip my tea instead of answering, and she points her finger in my face. “Well, now Iknowthere’s someone.” Her eyes light up with excitement. “Who? Is he from town or the tour? You’ve been holding out on me, Ryan.”

Lennox grabs the muffin from my hand and tries to shove it in her mouth, and I take the distraction as a reprieve, unsure of what I want to admit to her mother... Or myself.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I declare with all seriousness, not finding any of this funny.