Page 57 of Captivating

So many hours of writing while he spars.

So it’s no surprise when I slide my hand in his and let him pull me to my feet. But the look on his face is different this time. It’s confusing and exciting and makes it hard to breathe.

“The truth, princess. The one they all know but you don’t.” His rough thumb traces circles on my wrist, and I want to squirm under his touch, but I don’t. This is Killian. The boy who carried my books for me for weeks when I was stuck in an air boot freshman year. The one who never misses a performance. The one who gave me my lucky necklace.

“Help me out then. It’s not nice that I’m the only one left in the dark.” I smile and hold my ground.

This moment feels important.

Or maybe that’s just my inner romantic running wild.

“The one where they know they can’t hold a candle to you, Lilah Belle.”

Oh . . . that.

“Right. Because I’m your best friend and all...”

Not like I haven’t heard that before.

Broken. Record.

Killian wraps a big hand around the back of my head in a way he’s never touched me before, and I think my heart skips a beat. “No, Lilah. Because it’s you... And you’re—you’re different.”

He tilts my head back, so I’m looking right into his bright green eyes, and I realize I only have a few days left before I leave. That’s the only reason I grow the lady balls I suddenly have. “Are you ever going to kiss me, Killian?”

“Lilah...” He swallows, and I think my heart sinks down to the floor with that one movement.

“Oh my goodness... I shouldn’t have—I didn’t mean—” I pull back, but Killian’s hold on me tightens.

“Just wait, princess. Not all of us have the same way with words you do. It takes some of us longer to put our thoughts together.” His lips tug up, and I want to cry.

I don’t want to leave him.

Everything is going to be different when I come back.

But I have to go.

This is my dream.

“Lilah... I’m not going to kiss you tonight because you leave in five days, twelve hours, and”—he looks over at the clock then back to me and blows out his breath—“and about forty-five minutes.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” My defenses go up, and my confusion settles in for another round of ping-pong.

“Because when I kiss you, Lilah, it’s going to be the beginning of everything, not the end. It’s not going to be goodbye. It’s going to be welcome home, I missed you.” I gasp, and Killian takes a step impossibly closer, sucking every last little bit of oxygen from the gym, making it hard to breathe.

“When I kiss you, you’re going to be the last girl I kiss for the rest of my life. It was always going to be you. You’re it. You’re going to be my girl. And I’m not ready for that with you leaving. Your life is about to explode, and I can’t wait to watch it all happen for you, but I’m not going to be the asshole who makes you wish you were here instead of doing your thing. The whole world is going to fall in love with you, Lilah, and I’m a greedy asshole who wishes he didn’t have to share you already.”

“Killian...” I whisper as the first tear falls.

“No tears, princess. I’m going to need you to remember that I loved you first, and when you’re done, I’m going to love you last. Can you do that for me?”

“What if I don’t want to wait?” I ask so softly, I’m surprised he can even hear me.

The way he runs his hand over my head sends tingles through my entire body.

“Guess you’re going to have to trust me.” He pulls me against his chest, and I wrap my arms around his waist. “Do you trust me, Lilah?”

“With my life, Killian.”

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