Page 99 of Shea's Hero

“Um.” His brow furrows. “Then what’s the point of the show?”

“Well, it’s more entertainment, really. And some of the dates are cool. Like last week?—”

“Hi, guys!” The door opens and Penny beams at us. “I’m so glad you’re here. Ari and Thea just got here, and so is Cash. Ben couldn’t come because his mom got a cold and she can’t babysit. So he’s home with the kids.” She gives both of us a quick hug. “Come in! See the new place!”

We follow Penny inside and into a cozy living room, all decorated in pale grays and lavenders, with lush green plants set in front of the windows and pastel watercolor landscapes on the walls. Cash is sitting at one end of the couch with Ari on his lap, and Thea is sprawled out on an armchair beside it.

As soon as we walk into the room, Ari says with a little laugh, “It’s about time! Were you guys making out in the car again?”

“Ari.”Thea tosses a tortilla chip at her. “Do I need to remind you how many times you kept me waiting while you”—she makes little quotes with her fingers—“helpedCash with something?”

“And you and Ben didn’t do the same thing?” Ari retorts, and flicks the chip back at her. “Anyway.” She turns to me and Oliver. “I’m just kidding. Mostly. But I’m desperate to watch this episode. Do you know how many times I almost got spoiled today? With the number of articles online, I knowsomethingbig happened.”

Oliver laughs. “Well, I don’t want to keep you from finding out.”

Penny gestures at the empty end of the couch. “You guys sit there. I’ll take the other chair. But first, I’ll grab some wine for everyone.”

As Oliver and I make our way to the couch, Penny darts into the kitchen and a few seconds later, the sound of cabinets opening and closing can be heard. Then seconds later, a quiet, “Oh, poop!”

Thea giggles. Raising her voice, she calls out, “Pen, is everything okay?”

“Yes.” A pause. “Well.” There’s a moment of silence before she comes back into the living room, her smile sheepish and her cheeks pink. “I thought I bought wine. I wassureI did. But I can’t find it anywhere.” Her smile fades. “I’m so sorry. I’ll run out and get some. You guys go ahead and start the show.”

“Oh, no, Pen. It’s fine,” Thea replies. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I can go,” Cash volunteers. He lifts Ari off his lap and gets up. “It’s just a quick trip to the wine store. I don’t mind missing the first ten minutes or so.”

From his expression, it looks like he wouldn’t mind missing more than that. Considering how much Ari loves reality romance shows, he’s probably glad for the brief reprieve.

“That’s a great idea.” Ari smiles up at him. “I promise I’ll fill you in on everything you miss.”

Cash bends down to brush a quick kiss across her lips. “Thanks, honey.” Standing, he glances at Oliver. “Want to come?”

Oliver’s hand tenses around mine. A muscle ticks in his jaw.

I can tell he wants to say no. That he’d prefer to stay with me.

But he hasn’t really spent much time alone with his friends since we’ve been back together, and I feel a little bad about that. Not that I’ve told him he can’t, I would never, but I know he has a hard time leaving me alone.

I’m not alone here, though. I have Ari, Thea, and Penny to keep me company. And the wine store is literally five minutes away. So I give his hand a little squeeze and say gently, “Oll. You should go.”

His lips press together. “Shea…”

“It’s fine. Really.” With a smile, I add, “Go. It’ll be ten minutes, like Cash said. You guys can talk about the Yankees on the way there.”

Oliver stares at me, indecision warring in his gaze. Then he nods. “Okay.”

As he gets up, I whisper in his ear, “Small steps, remember?”

His lips lift. “I know.”

Even though it’s the right thing to do, it still stings a little once he’s gone. It always does.

Tucking my legs against my chest, I wedge myself in the corner of the couch and try to focus on what Ari’s saying about the proposed cast for the next season ofBachelor in Paradiseinstead of the empty hole in my chest.

Maybe it’ll get better in time. Maybe I won’t spend my workdays constantly looking at my phone, waiting for Oliver’s next text. Maybe I won’t count the minutes every time we’re separated, anxiously anticipating when we can be together again.

Or maybe not. Maybe I don’t want it to.

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