Page 57 of Shea's Hero

First, get out of the bedroom. That would be a good start.

Scooping Shea into my arms, I carry her back into the living at a jog. She yelps and grabs my neck. “Oliver. We’re going in the wrong direction!”

Once I get to the couch, I sit down and arrange her on my lap. Then I hold her gaze as I say as gently as I can, “It’s not that I don’t want to.”

“What?” Hurt flashes in her eyes. “I thought?—”

“Trust me. I have thought about making love to you every day. Multiple times. Probably too many times, if I’m being honest.”

“Then why?”

“Because…” Please say the right thing. “Because I want this to be right. For our first time?—”

“It’s not our first time. Not even close.”

“But this time it is. And I want to make it perfect. With flowers and massages and champagne and hours to take our time.”

Her forehead pinches in confusion. “Champagne?”

I kiss the tiny puzzled lines. “Yes. And strawberries. It’s supposed to be romantic.”

As Shea stares at me, I try to explain. “Yes, I want to make love to you right now. Not sex. Making love. More than anything. But after everything you’ve been through the last two days, I just… I want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Oll. I am.” At my raised eyebrows, she gives me a sheepish look. “Well. Mostly.”

“Can we just…” I crack open my chest and pull my heart out, ready to hand it over. “For me, Shea.Ineed to know you’re okay. That you’ve eaten and you’re rested and those drugs still aren’t in your body. Please don’t think I’m rejecting you. I’m not. Once those shadows”—I brush my thumb across the dark smudges under her eyes—“are gone, and you’ve had some time to settle in, we will definitely make love.Manytimes.”

A few seconds go by as Shea studies me, not frowning, but not smiling, either.

Then she kisses me lightly. “Okay. I get it. If our positions were flipped, I’d want to make sure you’re okay, too.” A pause, and then, fiercely, “But I’m not waiting long. Because then Iwillfeel rejected.”

“Never.” Threading my hand through her hair, I cup the back of her head and kiss her again. “I’m not. And I won’t. I promise.”

Her lips twitch. “Not like that time in Ocean City, right?”

“Like what ti—” Oh. Right. The romantic weekend getaway for our one-year anniversary that turned out to be anything but. “I wouldn’t really say I rejected you, Shea.”

“Well, it was our anniversary, and I bought all that sexy lingerie. Plus, the edible massage oil—” She stops and widens her eyes hopefully. “Can we get some more of that? For when wedomake love?”

And there it goes again. Right back at attention.

Sternly commanding my body to stand down, I reply, “Definitely. We’ll order it tonight.” Then I add, “And for the record, we didn’t have sex that weekend because weliterallycouldn’t sleep on the bed. That was one of the worst places I’ve ever stayed, and that’s saying a lot.”

Shea laughs. “It looked nice online. How was I to know those were old pictures?”

“You mean pictures from twenty years ago, more like.”

“Maybe.” She snuggles against me. “It was a memorable trip, though. Sleeping out on the beach because it was cleaner than our hotel room. And trying to shower without touching anything.”

“It was memorable,” I agree. “But I wouldn’t have done it any differently. It was special because I was with you.”

“Oliver.”

Sadness touches her features, and I just know she’s thinking about the time we lost.

“No, Shea. Don’t feel bad.” Framing her cheek with my hand, I hold her gaze. “We’re together. And we’re going to go on more trips. Make new memories. That’s the important thing.”

After a silent moment, she gives me a little nod. The sadness in her eyes fades. With a smile, she says, “You’re right. We have lots of new memories to make. And I can’t wait.”

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