Page 50 of Her Fearless Ronin

What kind of man would that make me?

The monster you’re always claiming to be,the insidious voice taunted from within.

I looked down at Yuko, his restlessness growing evident.

“The little guy’s probably hungry; the milk is in the bag in the car,” Hoka chimed in casually, his tone lightening the mood.

“Too cool to carry it yourself?” I retorted with a laugh.

He snorted, a playful smile tugging at his lips. “Please, I’m cool enough to pull that off.” His expression grew more serious. “Listen, just think about it, okay? We can revisit this discussion once the Valdez situation is behind us. Alright?”

I nodded in acknowledgment, and we turned back, heading toward the car parked in its familiar spot. “I’ll swing by your hotel tomorrow. Maybe you should bringsome food for Oda tonight. I’m sure he’s still pissed off,” Hoka offered as he got into the car.

“Tell you what, I’ll get him a case of beer and a burger, and we’ll call it even,” I quipped, closing his car door before watching him drive away. Turning, I retraced my steps up the street to where my bike was parked.

My mind was a whirlwind. Yes, I was reclaiming my life, but it wasn’t the same life. I had evolved, transformed by the woman who had altered my very existence.

The quiet whisper surfaced again, a gentle yet persistent suggestion. Maybe she’d want to come with you. Perhaps she didn’t yearn for that form of freedom.

I sighed, shaking my head as I swung a leg over the bike’s saddle. No, I couldn’t presume her desires. I couldn’t coerce her into a life she hadn’t sampled, a choice she hadn’t even been given the opportunity to consider.

It would be a twisted pact, a manipulation of sorts, and I couldn’t permit myself to be that selfish.

Hope Myers mattered too much to me. I couldn’t deny it any longer. And for her sake, I had two options—stay and transform into the man she deserved, or leave and ensure that I’d never return.

Chapter 15

Hope

The soft hum of the ceiling fan overhead was the only sound in the room as I began packing up my mother’s belongings. I looked at her, fast asleep in the single bed, as I moved silently around the room.

It was not all bad, though. I was pleased she was starting a new chapter in her life at the center, and she would have access to all the care she needed there.

Pausing for a moment, I sat on the edge of the bed, letting my thoughts drift to the unexpected encounter earlier today. Meeting Hoka at the café was not something I had anticipated, especially not with a baby cradled lovingly in his arms. The sight of the stern yakuza boss playing with his child was nothing short of surreal. I couldn’t help but smile, thinking of the tender way he’d held the baby, the loving gaze he directed at the little one. It was a stark contrast to what one might imagine when thinking of a feared underworld figure.

I found myself wondering about Violet, his wife. Was she traditional or more like me, with dreams and ambitions that stretched beyond family roles? The eagerness and apprehension to meet her on Saturday bubbled inside me.

I toyed with the thin yellow scarf in my hand. The sight of Hoka and his baby made something stir within me. If the boss of the yakuza could find happiness, domesticity, and perhaps even normalcy in the midst of his tumultuous world, then why couldn’t Jiro and I have that future?

He needs to want it, though,the voice in my head whispered, causing a pang of doubt.

The gentle vibration of my phone broke my concentration. Instinctively, I thought it might be Max again, asking if I could cover for him in the morning. I rolled my eyes in advance, preparing to send a half-joking, half-serious reply.

But when I grabbed my phone, my heart did a little flip.It was Jiro.

Are you up?

My brows knitted in confusion as I walked out of the room and closed the door behind me. It was past midnight. I hadn’t even realized how engrossed I’d become in my task, losing track of time. Why would he be texting at this hour?

Yes, packing my mother’s stuff. Is everything okay?I replied, fingers hastily typing out the message.

His response came quickly, causing a fresh wave of anxiety and excitement.Yes. I just want to see you. I’m in front of your building.

The flurry in my stomach felt like I’d swallowed a herd of wild broncos, each one bucking and kicking with anticipation. Without thinking, I rushed to the window, peering down, half expecting to see him looking up. But of course, I couldn’t make out any details from this height.

I hurried to the door, suddenly hyperaware of my appearance. My oversized white shirt had probably seen better days, my yoga pants were not the most flattering, and I could only imagine the state of my hair. But this was Jiro. The man always looked flawless, like he’d walked out of a fashion magazine. And when I opened the door, he didn’t disappoint. There he was in dark blue jeans that fit him just right and a green Henley shirt that made his eyes pop. It wasn’t fair, really.

“My mother is asleep,” I whispered, not wanting to wake her. I motioned for him to follow me into the living room, moving aside some of the boxes to make space. “I’m packing her things for the center. I… Thank you for what you did. I shouldn’t have reacted that way.”

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