Page 75 of Sorrow

He squirts some dish soap up both of our arms and starts scrubbing, leaving me to side-eye the jungle cat staring at me. “No, you haven’t.”

“She’s a soulless void inside,” he whispers. “Don’t stare into her eyes too long.”

“Whatever.” Chuckling, I dry myself off and start opening his cabinets looking for liquor. “I need a drink. And shut up, I know I’m still on shift.”

“I don’t care. Today I learned my line is cutting brakes on a glitter wrapped 4Runner, anything else is fair game. I got some Jack in that one right there, but there’s also Absinthe if you’re trying to get fired.”

Everything I’ve done so far has been in hopes to save my job — and my sister. Getting fired now would be stupid. “Jack it is. Want one?”

“Yeah, pour me a double. I’m off the next two days.” His cat meows at him until he gives her a treat to shut her up, then leans against the countertop to watch me. “Do you have spare clothes in the car?”

“Yeah, I’ve been thrown up on enough times that I always keep a spare uniform in the trunk. I’ll change before I head back out.”

“I can burn them along with mine out back.” His backyard reminds me of simpler times. Even though we didn’t hang out all that much, I know he has a fire pit back there and a great view of the stars. “Just tell them it got destroyed helping some old lady put oil in her car.”

That’s not a bad idea, so I start stripping right there in his kitchen. We don’t have nearly as much gear as we should, but my gun, radio, and nightstick all end up on his counter before I reach for my badge.

Glancing down, I panic just a little when I see a different kind of void where my badge should be. The frayed holes in my chest pocket are there, but my badge... is not. “Fuck me, I know I had it earlier. Did it fall off in the garage? Damn thing’s been busted for months.”

“The garage would be the best case scenario.” Like I need him to say it. “You can look on the way to your car, but I think you need to prepare for the worst.”

This is way too serious of a conversation to be having in our boxers, especially considering the potential consequences.

I wanted them to think it was me, or at least be pretty sure — but if my badge fell off when I was inside Carly’s car, they’ll haveall the proof they need. I could be fired, arrested... or worse.

God, sometimes I make seriously fucking stupid decisions. I let Carter’s voicemail send me straight into revenge mode and I didn’t stop to think what their response would be. What they could do to me or Sam or Hayes. What theywilldo.

“Fuck, come help me look for it. If it’s not here, we have to go.”

And since they were seconds from finding the 4Runner when we left... I just have to hope we’re not too late.

32

Naps are never long enough, especially after sex. The things Hayes did to me... the memory makes me squirm.

We didn’t even involve blood this time since he insisted I needed more time to heal. But the things that man can do with his fingers, tongue and cock are far better than what he can do with a knife, and as I look at the neglected set of blades on the nightstand, I’m not sad we didn’t use them.

Smiling into the pillow, I reach down to play with the mess he left between my thighs.“Don’t shower without me,”he’d warned.“You’re mine.”

That’s been the rule for a while now, yet I still get butterflies every time he reminds me to follow it.

The clock shining dim light into the room tells me he’s been gone for a while, so I get up, throw on a tank top and shorts in caseBoo came home and follow the sound of the music. Hayes always blasts music when he works in the garage. I don’t know how he hears himself think, though he swears it helps. I guess I’d rather listen to rock and roll than the sound of power tools, too.

He’s busy when I open the door at the end of the hall, and I know better than to startle him when he’s using his table saw. I spend a few moments just watching the sweat bead on the back of his neck, the muscles flex under his shirt, and the way his hair just teases his eyebrows when he leans over before shutting the door as quietly as I can. I can wait to shower until he’s done.

Still grinning to myself, I make my way to the kitchen for a snack. There’s still no sign of my brother. He’s been with Amaya more often lately when he isn’t working, so I’m not worried — though I can’t help but wonder why he’s spending time with her at all if he really believes she’s betraying him.

Keep your enemies closer, I guess. I just didn’t think “closer” meant balls deep.

I really hope he knows what he’s doing.

The dull drone of the microwave is almost completely obscured by Hayes’ music. It’s so loud even out here that it’s vibrating the house, causing the empty glasscontainers on top of the fridge to clink together. I honestly can’t believe it didn’t wake me up sooner, but I’m glad for it.

I deserved that nap.

Right as I open the door to get my food out, I hear the muffled sound of glass breaking. For a moment, I think it’s part of the song. But I know this one. That doesn’t make sense. So what—

Whipping around, I see shadows bouncing off the floor in the foyer. Someone’s here, and if they had to break in, I’m guessing it isn’t Boo.

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